subject: Stop Your Divorce and Save Your Marriage Today [print this page] There are steps you can take today to stop your divorce, save your marriage and live happily ever after. Now, few marriages are storybook romances, but we're talking about taking a couple from the bottom of despair to having a healthy, happier relationship. Stop Your Divorce The first thing you should do is stop all begging or pleading for your spouse to stop your divorce. Your desperation can cause your spouse to feel overwhelming guilt for your pain and it can cause them to escalate the entire divorce process just to escape the misery. Your best bet will be to deal with your spouse as calmly and as reasonably as possible. Discuss these benefits of stopping a divorce to see if your ex will agree to give the two of you a chance to work through any problems before filing: Less damage to your children
Financially better off if you stay together
Time you have already invested in the marriage
Your home and lifestyle can stay the same It is okay to agree with your spouse that the marriage is in trouble. You would have to be a saint to think otherwise if your spouse is considering divorce. However, talking about the benefits of trying to stop your divorce and save your marriage can open your spouse up to the idea of at least giving it a shot. The spouse who is considering divorce has nothing to lose by waiting. Save Your Marriage Once you can get your spouse to stop your divorce or at least agree to temporarily hold off, you need to work on a plan to save the marriage. It may be difficult to get your spouse to cooperate. Even though they've agreed to stop your divorce (for now), that may have been just to appease you, assuage their guilt and try to make the whole process easier on themselves. You are going to have to work hard at getting your spouse to give it a real effort. Use professional counseling, workbooks, family support, or any other tool at your disposal to get them to open up and talk about the problems in the relationship. Until those problems are acknowledged and addressed, your marriage is still at risk. You may need to gently remind your spouse about the reasons for trying to stop your divorce now to save your marriage. Don't nag or harp on those benefits, just use them to your advantage as needed. This may encourage your spouse to stay focused on the goal of building a happier, healthier relationship. Saying or doing the wrong thing can push your spouse further away. Hence, the importance of trying to stay calm during this time even if your emotions are getting the best of you. Live Happily Ever After I know, life isn't a fairy tale, but wouldn't you like to be one of those couples that have it all pulled together, even when life is tough? Who doesn't want a real partnership where the two of you can depend on each other, like to spend time together, and can communicate well? It is possible but it takes a lot of work. Once you get through rebuilding your relationship, you need to constantly practice the relationship skills you learned during that phase and consistently put forth a strong effort to remain close and connected to your spouse and then you actually can live happily ever after. It is possible to stop your divorce and save your marriage. It takes patience, communication, and learning new tools to help the two of you deal with difficult issues but, in the end, you reap all the benefits of staying together.
