subject: First Date Tips For Men - Turn Your Nervous Energy Into Strength [print this page] If you are anything like me, first dates used to be very tough for me. What will the night be like? Will we like each other? What if something goes wrong? Years ago I used to be an amateur magician. One of my favorite magicians is David Copperfield. I have been watching him since I was ten years old. When I lived in Vegas I heard David say something that I thought was very interesting. He said that even after 20+ years of performing he still gets a little nervous before he goes on stage. "Everyone" he said "gets butterflies in their stomach before a big event, it's the pro's that know how to make those butterflies, fly in formation!" That was David's way of saying that you can use that nervous energy as a positive force. When you go on a first date remember that she is probably just as nervous as you are. Remember that there are plenty of other choices out there so if this one doesn't go well there are other opportunities. Remember that you can use your nervous energy as power to put forth your confidence.
It goes without saying that your date is likely just as nervous as you are. Anytime we meet or go out with another person there is a certain anxiety that goes a long with it. No one is immune to that. We all feel self-conscious about certain things and we think that is the first thing others will notice. Actually it is just the opposite in most cases. The other person is so concerned about making a good impression themselves that they hardly have time to go over you with a fine toothed comb. Be yourself; make the effort to let the real you come out. Don't worry about any appraisals they might be making about you. The less you worry about it the better you will do.
Keep in mind that this is very likely not the last first date you will go on in your life. There will be others and those opportunities may be better than the one you have in front of you today. This woman is just a role play, a practice session for the real deal keep that in mind if you feel your nerves coming on strong. Try new things, let your words flow, keep these thoughts in your mind. Be interested in what she has to say. Listen and make comments. Ask her questions pertaining to her interests. You will find that if you keep in mind that this is just a practice run the nerves will diminish and you will be able to think more clearly. Keep in mind that you always want to speak way less than you listen. God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason!
If you get to a point that the nerves have you completely bound up in energy there is nothing left to do, but take control. Excuse yourself to the restroom and get in front of the mirror. Look yourself in the face and say to yourself "I am not going to let my nerves destroy me!" Look at yourself and decide to use that nervous power inside you to be confident and well spoken. Decide to make your nerves your allies by taking them by the reigns and controlling them. Nerves are like excitement, it can be helpful or it can be deadly. As long as you decide to control them then they are a great power that can be used to your advantage.
Soon the night will be over and you will be able to sit back and think about what you did right and what you did wrong. Don't over analyze at this point. Many times two people just aren't right for each other and it had nothing to do with the color shirt you wore or what joke you told after dinner. If there are things that you made mistakes on then keep those in mind for the next date and try to improve. Becoming an online dating champion is a lifelong process. I welcome you to the playing field.
