subject: My colleague become my boss [print this page] My colleague become my boss My colleague become my boss
Would you feel comfortable if your boss was your friend? Do you think if this person got the job while you are working together already, it would change your relationship? Could you continue frequenting he or her in your personal life? Would there be any new rules to follow so that this situation does not undermine the work nor your friendship?
Amy, a young professional, a project manager for four years adored or used to adore working. Isn't this refreshing? But as happiness is sometimes quite fragile, while reading this article, ask yourself what you would do in her place?
Friendship and work
Amy became friends with Sally, a colleague from work. Overtime, they even became best friends. For Amy, her relationship with Sally is what is most precious after her own family. The two young women in their thirties are living with a partner and both have a daughter almost the same age. Both spouses and children get along perfectly, the two families have even made a nice trip down south last winter. On June 1, Sally has been promoted. She became the new project coordinator. She and a colleague postulated to replace the retirement departure of John. Amy was not a candidate. She loves her work and does not see herself in the position of John. Contrariwise, Sally was very excited to get the promotion. She clearly distinguished herself by her leadership capabilities and was the one who was chosen. Starting from August, Sally is the one who deals with customers and suppliers, and will also be supervising the work of five people, including Amy. Presently, John informs and trains Sally. Amy is watching. She can not believe what she sees and can not imagine herself to be under the authority of her best friend. She wonders if she can still invite her at social dinners with her husband and daughter, or still go to the movies together. What will we talk about now, she asks herself. Before, they liked to criticize the management style of John and laughed together often to defuse complicated situations. She feels she has lost all her reference points. She says she feels so mixed up. Amy wonders if she should resign and find work elsewhere to preserve his friendship with Sally. She knows she could easily find another job because there is demands in her field. She hesitate to confront the situation as it is today. However, if she finally take this decision, she wants to know how to deal with Sally and wants to adapt to this change. It is a huge contract and wants to know what I'm thinking about all this. And you, what do you think?
Time to leave or stay
The present situation in which you are installed is now destabilized. I understand that the situation is peculiar and, indeed, you must make a choice: go or stay. Leaving seems the easiest solution, which does not mean it is not interesting. But is it so simple? You seem to be confident and know your strengths and capacities, you will find a new job if this is your choice. But you will mourn losing the job you love. Also, will you blame your friend Sally for this change in your career? You really should not fall into that trap. Staying has a different challenge. Objectively, this situation may not change anything in your friendly relationships. In truth you are just playing different roles in the same corporation tied to the work you do. Sally got a promotion for criteria s purely corporatism. In fact, you continue to be both at the service of the company, but in different roles. The new situation still requires an ability to adapt to this change.
A few questions
1. Are you afraid that Sally could abuse of her power over you?
2. Ask yourself what 's the inconvenience for you to be supervised by Sally?
3. Are you subject to a over pride, envious or competitive tendency?
4. Do you feel that you are no longer an equal of Sally?
5. If you go, do you think you will have some regrets?
A few advices
If you choose to stay, you want to see your friend bloom in her post and you should not feel inferior to her. She has leadership abilities, you have other qualities. It's good to be different: often, these are the complementarity that ensure that there is attraction, love or friendship. You must adapt and agree the best you can to her style of management. If you choose to leave, you should not blame Sally and embrace your choice. Sally is not make responsible for your decision and do your best to turn this new occasion into a winning choice for you. You could very well see this as an interesting challenge in your own career. You will have the opportunity to talk together about your new challenges now in a different environment. Also, this may require that you do not speak about work in your personal contacts. Address issues related to work as possible in general meetings as long as it concerns only the two of you . In personal life, continue exactly as before, this discipline will help the situation. And as soon as possible, talk about all this with her. She has an attitude to adopt towards you at work due to this change of role.
In conclusion
Whether you choose to stay or leave, assume your decision and have trust in yourself, have no regrets or bitterness. After all changes is a part of life.
