subject: How To Reconcile A Marriage In 5 Steps [print this page] How To Reconcile A Marriage In 5 Steps How To Reconcile A Marriage In 5 Steps
When you are facing deep marital problems that could lead to separation or divorce - or already have - then you need to face certain facts. First of all, you have to recognize that things have gotten to a very serious point indeed. Once the problem has reached this level of seriousness, your options for making things better are more limited than they were when your problems were less grave.
What you need is a step-by-step plan for tackling your marital problems. Here is how to reconcile a marriage in 5 steps:
1. Carry out a self-examination:
The most important step you can take in reconciling your marriage is the first one: that of examining yourself objectively. Self-examination involves look within, past any of the intense emotions of sadness, anger, or depression that you may be going through right now. Once you are able to see past all of those emotions, you will be able to recognize yourself for who you are.
You are going to find a person who is loving at the center, but who - like the rest of us - has a lot of problems. This is totally normal. You are a human being, so forgive yourself for any character flaws you have. Most importantly, recognize anything that you may have done within your marriage which contributed to the situation you are in right now with your husband or wife. Write down your observations.
2. Try to view your spouse as objectively as you can:
Next, do the same thing regarding your spouse. Close your eyes and see him or her in your mind's eye. Recognize that they, too, are a loving person who is doing their best. They, too, have their problems. Determine which character flaws in your spouse helped contribute to the situation you are both in right now.
3. Feel the emotions deeply so that you can take them out of the equation for a moment:
Now, take a few moments to indulge in your own emotions about your current situation. What are you feeling? What are you going through? It is probably a mixture of many different feelings, felt all at once. That is okay. Just feel it all. By allowing yourself to experience your emotions, you can help yourself set them aside so that you can move beyond them for a few moments.
4. Focus on what worked in your relationship:
Now that you have hopefully reached a place of being able to see the situation more clearly than before, it is time to do a bit of thinking about what worked in your relationship. What was the core quality that kept the two of you together, engaged in conversation, and happy? That is the place to start as you rebuild your relationship and reconcile your marriage.
5. Put together a plan to make your relationship work again:
Finally, put together an action plan for making your relationship work again. Do not rely solely on your own idea for making things work. Seek expert advice.
Take these 5 steps in order to reconcile your marriage and find happiness again.
