subject: Are You Presently Focusing On - Should I Get Back Together With My Ex? [print this page] Are you asking yourself, "Should I get back together with my ex?" If you want to get back together again with your ex, you owe it to yourself to do a bit of soul searching. You need to be completely honest with yourself. You have to evaluate if you and your ex get back together, will it truly make you happy, and you would not end up straight down the same road that caused the breakup in the first place. It is really always easy after a break up to exclusively think of the good times. It's important for you to try to be entirely objective and bring to mind both the good and the bad moments.
In reality, usually there are not very many relationships which were unworthy of salvaging. If you and your ex wasted more hours fighting than you did doing things that were good and also fun, then perhaps you should be thinking about moving on. If most of your time together was spent getting physically and/or verbally abused, it in all probability wasn't a healthy relationship. If your ex lover was emotionally volatile, you could be better off finding some other person. If the relationship overall had been a good one, not abusive, and he/she had a sound mind, the following should certainly help you and your ex lover to get back together.
Pestering and pushing your ex isn't a a good idea. Whenever you try to constantly get in touch with your ex; whether it is by cellphone, web mail, text message, or stalking him or her, you're going to do more harm than good. Your ex may see this as a sign of desperation. Doing this can actually push him or her further away than draw your ex closer to you.
Don't fight, beg, or plead with your ex about the old relationship. It's easy while you and your mind are all alone. Your mind will come up with various mistakes that you have done. Even when your ex lover broke up with you they may have given you reasons why. Now, you're quite likely beating yourself up over such thoughts. You probably wish you had never done that stuff. The past is the past. Now is the present.
If you get it in your head that the relationship is currently over, you can not go back in time, though you probably wish you could. Focus on what is going on today. The only thing worse than obsessively calling your ex would be to beg or plead with him or her. Make promises how you might change, etc... This approach won't help you and your ex lover get back together again at all.
If you back off, give your ex lover a little time, and live your life, you will be doing yourself a big favor in more ways than one. You'll probably become more desirable to your ex, because you're allowing them to think about you and miss you. You'll also be helping yourself to live a happier, more fulfilling life also and you might find your answer to - should I get back together with my ex?