subject: Self-esteem Self-expression And the Sense Of Significance [print this page] Self-esteem Self-expression And the Sense Of Significance
One of the basic human needs is a sense of significance. We need to feel that we are somebody, that we matter and that we are important. That need is so great that it gets to define whom we are, how we interact with others and most of our behavior.
That need for self-significance and the way that we seek to fulfill it is of capital importance yet most people have never stopped and consciously thought about it. If asked how they fulfill that need, most people would be at lost for words.
They don't even suspect what strategy they use so they don't have a clue if they are doing it in a positive and empowering way or if they are literally their own worst enemy. They don't know if they get a sense of significance in a way that aligns with who they truly are or if they simply follow society's dictate and do the fashionable thing.
In order to progress and grow as individuals, the need for significance should be an expression of who we truly are and not the other way around. That is, who we truly are should dictate the technique used to get significance instead of having the technique defining who we are.
The difference between acting as a tug or a Good Samaritan is in the way that the sense of significance is sought. This fact is often illustrated in the stories of members of street gangs. The stories are almost always the same.
A young hood meets someone who shows him a better way of expressing who he is and, almost overnight, we have another success story. Someone was lucky enough to discover a better way of gaining that sense of significance and a life of problems and miseries is turned into an admirable epic of courage and determination.
The ideal ways of fulfilling our sense of significance is through a positive contribution to society. It's a win win situation. We get to contribute; it makes us feel good about who we are which increases the self-esteem and by the same token, the self-confidence.
The other interesting thing about contribution is the fact that it's under our control. There is always something and some ways that we can contribute to make this world a better place therefore, our contributions can be adjusted to whatever condition that we happen to be going through.
On the other hand, if we seek to fulfill our need for significance by means that we cannot always control such as displays of wealth, personal appearance or athletic performances, the day might come when it can no longer be done and it could prove disastrous for the sense of self-esteem and self-worth.
What is most important in all of this is to understand that one of our main drives in life is the need for significance. There are many ways that it can be done. Some of those ways are empowering and others can literally destroy our life.
We need to examine how we fulfill that need, check to see if it's done in an empowering way and if not, simple find a more appropriate way of doing it. We all have talents that can be exploited to do it and using those talents to contribute to the betterment of mankind is the ideal and most appropriate way.
Every one of us is special; every one of us was placed on this little Planet for a purpose. Finding that purpose and filling it is the ultimate way of gaining that sense of significance. Something that we should think about.
