subject: Customer Etiquette: 12 Tips for Being a Good Customer [print this page] Customer Etiquette: 12 Tips for Being a Good Customer
Congratulations! You've made it through another year complete with rent payments, Hollywood tabloids, anniversaries, and spilt milk. But there's still two months left (and in many cases the most crucial two months) to make good on those promises to call your siblings and to seek out the best Christmas gifts for your loved ones.
Now is the time to cut back on your Diet Coke habits to pocket a few extra dollars for holiday purchases. But before you clear out the closet to make room for the abundant Christmas presents and load your CD player up with Christmas tunes, I ask that you keep one thing in mind. As soon as you step foot inside a store you cease to be an average law-abiding citizen and you instantly become a dreaded customer who is the cause of raised blood pressures amongst retail workers everywhe
But you don't have to be a loathsome customer. You can make the decision right now to be a customer who takes retail workers by surprise and actually walks in and out of the store with little or no lasting consequence to anyone in the store. Bellow are twelve tips (Twelve Days of Christmas, anyone?) to help you be that most coveted, invisible customer. (Remember, it's not because retail workers don't like you as a person, they just don't want to deal with you as a customer!)
1. If you call the store and someone answers the phone, they're open.
Besides, most stores make you sit through a recorded message that usually tells you the hours of operation. Once you get your information (i.e. hours, directions, ect.), feel free to hang up the phone. The recording will not be insulted. It's also okay to hang up if a live employee answers your call. Retail workers don't mind disconnected lines; it's just one less person they have to deal with.
Helpful Hint: Almost every store in America has a website with the store hours listed. Use it.
2. If someone is wearing a nametag, don't ask if they work there.
Seriously. It just makes you look ignorant. When in question, don't ask. Find someone else that works there.
3. Look for your product, not for a worker.
I understand you might be in a hurry, but you'd be surprised how easy things are to find in many stores. In fact positions are held at corporate levels specifically designed to determine in-store placement of every product to help make your shopping experience as quick and easy as possible.
Helpful Hint: Actually looking for the product yourself will enable you to find other gifts you would not have seen otherwise. One lap, strolling, around an average retail store is less than two minutes. Don't your loved ones deserve the bit of extra effort?
4. If you have to ask, at least know what you're asking for.
Retail workers don't want to shop with you and you shouldn't expect them to. Don't ask their opinion on what toy Johnny would like best. They've never seen Johnny, and they don't care what you get him as long as you buy something. If you're looking for a book, know the title and equally important - the author. If you simply give the description of the cover, then know that when you're laughing with somebody at your Christmas party, someone's laughing at you at theirs.
Helpful hint: If you can't read your child's wish list, don't expect anyone else to be able to. Confirm items in question with your child or just get them a workbook for their stocking.
5. Don't interrupt someone's work to ask a question.
If someone's arms are full while balancing on the top step of a ladder, be considerate, don't bother them with your question. Instead, if you find yourself approaching that dutiful worker, stop and ask yourself three things. 1) Will I look like a jerk for interrupting this person's work? 2) Is there anyone else I can ask? 3) Have I exercised tip 3 on this list?
6. Be patient. Retail workers understand you have to shop. Please understand that they have to help everybody.
The world does not revolve around you. No one wants to see your impression of Scrooge. If you're going to be pushy, impatient or irreverent, then stay home and don't come out until you can at least pretend to be a grown up.
Helpful hint: If you're showing signs of aggression or odious behavior a cunning retail worker will recognize this and deliberately take their time with the customer before you. Yes, just to tick you off even more.
7. Just because someone is wearing a nametag does not give you permission to call them by their name.
Retail workers do not choose to have their name display on their shirt, it's company policy. Do not, I repeat, do not repeatedly use their name in a conversation or to get their attention lest they think you're going to stalk them on facebook. Despite what you've heard from so-called experts, it's really the creepiest thing in the world and you will be resented for it. Only if the worker offers you their name are you permitted to address them by such.
Helpful hint: "Sir," "Ma'am," or "Ms." are perfectly acceptable according to gender and age. Better yet, you might want to scratch that "Ma'am.
8. Open your eyes. Read the signs. Follow the directions.
If you're standing in the checkout line waiting to ask the cashier a customer service question, you are sorely misusing your time. But do the world of retail (and the customers behind you) a favor while you're standing there. Look at all the large-print signs they put up just for you and consider for the next few minutes whether you should really yield to their directions. When the cashier doesn't leave her register unattended to lead you to where you need to go, don't throw a fit. Instead, reflect on the valuable lesson you learned about time-management
9. Cell phone usage where do I start?
Other than advising customers to use their inside voice (no one wants to hear about your digestive disorders or how your boyfriend hates your cats), I'm just going to address one overlooked issue out of the plethora of misuses with this devise. You might be able to afford that fancy phone you're showing off, but that retail worker you're refusing to hang the phone up for is likely struggling through college or was affected by the recession (hence, they're working in retail). You don't need to show your fancy gadgets off to them. Hang up the phone and speak to them as an equal human being.
Helpful Hint: Bluetooths make you look like you're talking to yourself. Sensible people will mock you.
10. Don't ask two different people for the same product.
If the retail worker says they don't carry what you're looking for, don't insult him by asking someone else. They work in the same store and are using the same system to look things up. Asking someone else will not necessarily produce new results.
11. Put things back where you found them!
Retail workers are not maids. They have enough to do without cleaning up your messes (really, they do). Throw your trash away. If you can't remember where you found an item return to the general area, stare at the shelf and match the picture of the item in your hand with the item on the shelf. Don't place it next to it, or on top of it. Instead, place the product directly in front of the matching item. If you don't know how to match pictures and put things back where you found them, then find a time machine, go back in time and repeat kindergarten.
Helpful hint: If intelligence isn't an issue then you're just being lazy. If intelligence is an issue and you can't find a time machine, then use your fancy phone to call someone to pick you up and admit you to a clinic. Never operate a moving vehicle if you can't put things back where you found them.
12. If someone wishes you a Merry Christmas, don't take them to court.
Not everyone celebrates every holiday observed in December, so "happy holidays" might not be an applicable greeting to many people (plus, it just sounds like some sappy after-school special). If someone wishes you a happy Hanukkah and you don't observe Hanukkah, feel free to wish them merriment and joy in the name of the particular festivity you represent.
