subject: Surviving Infidelity – What You Can Do Now To Make Surviving Infidelity Easier [print this page] Surviving Infidelity What You Can Do Now To Make Surviving Infidelity Easier
There is no easy way for surviving infidelity. It comes as a blow to your heart and doesn't get any easier to take or handle. You survive by taking one day at a time and putting one foot in front of the other until you no longer have to go through the motions.
There are things you can do, starting right now, that will make surviving infidelity easier for you to handle. But nothing you do is going to exactly make it a walk in the park. Here's what you need to do right now to get to work making things better.
1) Acknowledge that it has happened to you. Denial does no one any good. It's bad for you. It's bad for the person who cheated. It's bad for the marriage (assuming you want to work the marriage out after you've been given the news). You need to acknowledge that it has happened and really wrap your mind around it.
2) Decide to deal with it. It's easy to go the "Scarlet O'hara Route" and decide "I'll think about that tomorrow." Don't do it. This is not the time to look for easy. This is the time to roll up your sleeves and be ready for a little bit of the rough stuff that might come your way. Take your punches but land a few blows to things like doubt, insecurity, fear, and even guilt as they come along. Part of surviving infidelity and making it easier is learning that sometimes you have to fight back. I've included a link at the bottom of this article to a video that shows you how to fight back to save your marriage.
3) Don't let the opinions of other people affect your decision. Whether you stay or go needs to be a decision that you and your cheating spouse make together. It's not a decision that anyone else can make for you. Other people will not have to live with the consequences of a wrong decision so why would you let them impact the decision you make? They can't possibly know where your heart stands on this issue. Even you may need to take a little time to figure that out and you're on the inside track in this relationship.
4) Understand that nine times out of ten, your partner's cheating was all about your partner and had little, if anything, to do with you. Surviving is easier when you can stop feeling guilty and laying blame at your feet. It isn't your fault your partner cheated. The sooner you wrap your mind around that, the better you will find you are surviving infidelity after all.
