subject: Do You Really Want to Discover The Signs of Cheating? [print this page] Do You Really Want to Discover The Signs of Cheating?
Many people think they want to know if their lover is being unfaithful and so look for signs of cheating in their behaviour. But you need to understand that if you do discover that your partner is cheating on you, there is no turning back the clock and you are then faced with making the decision of whether or not to carry on with the relationship.
For many couples, infidelity is not always a reason to end a relationship. In fact, a lot of couples find that their relationship is stronger after cheating than it was beforehand. This is because it's often easy to get into a rut in our relationships and take our partners for granted. Once they cheat on you however, that's the wake up call that is needed to put the relationship back on to stronger ground.
However, it should be noted that the author is not making any excuses for one partner being unfaithful. As the innocent victim of a husband who was unfaithful, I do not believe there is ever a reason to cheat! Nonetheless, it would be unfair of me to advocate that you should end your relationship just because your partner has cheated on you. Ending a relationship for any reason should never be done without first weighing up all the options and only then deciding if you can carry on.
One Time Affairs
Was this a one time affair? Sometimes, for many reasons, we are faced with the temptation and opportunity to cheat on our partners. If your relationship isn't going well, then it can be harder to resist those tempations when they appear.
If you discover that your partner has had an affair and you are sure that it was the first and only time they have been unfaithful, then you need to take the time to discover the reasons behind it.
Were they feeling taken for granted in the relationship? Was it that someone paid them some extra attention and made them feel 'sexy'? Perhaps, as a couple, you have been too busy getting on with the daily strains of everyday living to make as much of an effort as a couple as you used to?
If you can discuss the reasons behind the affair and come to realize that, as long as put right the things that caused it to happen, that you still love each other, then there may very well be a good chance that your relationship can survive.
Serial Cheaters
If your partner has cheated on you more than once, then you have to accept that this is likely to be a continuing behavior pattern and they are not going to change. For some people, the ability to commit to just one partner is somthing they simply are unable or unwilling to do.
If your cheating partner falls into this bracket, then you are faced with continuing the relationship, knowing that they will cheat on you again, or ending it altogether and moving on to find someone who is able to remain faithful.
Do You Really Want to Know?
Believe it or not, sometimes it is easier to live with the suspicion of infidelity than to deal with the proof of it. If you feel you cannot face life without your partner by your side, yet you cannot face living with a cheater, then be very careful before you go looking to see if there are any signs of cheating in your partner's actions. If you do discover any, you will have to deal with them and make a decision one way or the other!
