subject: How Do I Get My Girl Back? [print this page] How Do I Get My Girl Back? How Do I Get My Girl Back?
If you've lost your girlfriend in a break up, then you're right there with every guy who's had his heart handed to him and every guy who's made the mistake of not knowing what he had until he lost her. You're feeling a sense of loss so overwhelming that you just don't know how life could ever be the same without them right now. There's only one thing on your mind right now, right? And, that's "how do I get my girl back?"
Here are some tips to help you to get the girl (again): 1 - Mend The Broken
If you are in a situation where your break up was due to something of your own fault, something that you did or said to push your girl away, then your first step is obviously to make amends. Apologize. Whatever the wrong is, make it right. Maybe you've already tried this, but ask yourself whether or not you gave it your most sincere efforts. If not, then there's no better time than now if you really are truly sorry.
Keep in mind that this step may not produce the immediate results that you are looking for. This holds especially true if your first attempts at apologizing or making things up to your girl didn't exactly come off as meaningful to her. That's because it will now be more difficult to make your girl believe that you truly are sorry about whatever you've done. This is a difficult but important first step towards getting your girl back, nonetheless, so swallow your pride and get to it.
2 - Let Your Best Side Shine
Your next step might seem obvious, but surprisingly it is often done all wrong or not at all. You need to show your girl all of your great qualities that she loved about you. The way some people fail in doing this is by acting "sweet" towards their ex or by doing generous favors for them and then expecting something in return. When they don't get the reciprocation that they expected from their ex, they switch their attitude to one of anger and resentment, and they lose any ground that they made toward reconciliation. That's like a game of one step forward and two steps back.
What you need to do is exercise patience and complete understanding. Be the "sweet" guy towards her because you want to be, and not because you are working towards a goal with the expectation of any specific results. The feeling that you get by doing nice things for her and making her happy is the reward you'll want to focus on and not your overwhelming "get my girl back" agenda.
3 - Pay Attention And Just Listen
As you continue to show your better side to your ex girl, she will probably begin to warm to you. She may even get to the point of sharing some of her feelings about you and possibly about the break up itself. That's great! You're making progress. However, it is imperative that you pay attention to what she says and learn from it. What you gain in knowledge at this point will need to be put to use in the future when and if the two of you get back together to avoid another break up.
There may be some things, some accusations even, that your ex girl talks to you about. This is important! Just listen. Don't try to defend yourself or try to tell her how she should feel. She has a right to have those feelings as you do your own. Let her share her feelings with you, and she'll be surprised and appreciate it when your response is not to interrupt her to argue your opinion on the subject. She'll also feel more comfortable about being more open with you in the future.
As you continue to work towards your "get my girl back" goal, just remember to take things slowly. If you sense that she is becoming uncomfortable with any of your actions, then step back a bit. Learn from your mistakes and experiment with different approaches. Learn from what your ex girl shares with you about her feelings, and apply what you've learned to help you along the way.
