subject: Dealing with Infidelity – What if He Cheats? [print this page] Dealing with Infidelity What if He Cheats?
What should you do if you suddenly find yourself dealing with infidelity? If you have found out that you've been cheated on, should you stay or should you go? Will he repent, or will he do it again? If you find yourself in this situation, you might not know where to turn. But there are a few steps you can take if you are dealing with infidelity that can help you start to get your life back.
Option 1 Should you stay?
There are really two possible parts to this question. The first is, will he do it again? That's a very tricky question. You will need to talk to him. As much as you want reassurances now, try to listen to your gut.
What is it telling you? Is he sorry he cheated, or is he only sorry that he got caught? Try to determine whether he is willing to explain and answer questions, or whether he is just coming up with excuses. A good place to start is with counseling, because if you are dealing with infidelity, you will find it nearly impossible to talk to him without getting too upset to stay impartial.
If you do decide to stay, the second question is, will I be able to build trust again? Even if you think that your man is truly repentant, you will need to restore peace to yourself. Try to get some distance from the situation, and figure out for yourself exactly what it will take to get you to the point where you will trust him again.
Option 2 Should you go?
You might decide that it would be best to end the relationship. If you don't feel that you can ever trust him again, it is probably best just to end it. This might be surprisingly difficult to do, even after you have been betrayed.
This is because your feelings of hurt and unreality can be so intense, that you will want things to go back to the way they were before. Even if your head tells you that you can't trust him, and you should get out, it will be tough to make your emotions cooperate for a while.
Whatever you decide, dealing with infidelity is not easy. But hang in there, and make the best decision for yourself.
