subject: Condolences-What is the Perfect Time to Express Them? [print this page] Condolences-What is the Perfect Time to Express Them?
If someone you care about suffers the loss of a loved one, it can be hard to know what to say and when to say it. When you express condolences, you are offering comfort when they need it most and it can be a wonderful way to show you care. If you're worried about when to offer your sympathies, there are a few tips that can help you express the sentiment at the right time and in the right way. Whether it's a coworker or a relative, you'll want to let them know you're sorry and offer support during their time of grief.
If the loss occurs in the life of someone you see on a regular basis, you'll want to express your condolences the next time you see them. A coworker you see every day, for example, you should approach them as soon as you learn of their loss to offer comfort and support. In these cases, something as simple as "I'm sorry for your loss" can be the best thing you can say. The important thing with expressing sympathy is to avoid saying too much, while making sure you sufficiently express the sentiment.
In the case of someone that you don't see regularly or that lives far away, you should write a sympathy card to offer condolences right away. If you were close to the deceased, it's a good idea to write a personal message that includes a memory of them when you send the card. For example, you might say something along the lines of "I am so grateful to have known (name). He/she was such a kind person." This will show your friend or family member you share in their grief. You can even reminisce about things you shared with the person that passed away.
Once you've offered condolences, it can be extremely thoughtful to check in as they move through the grieving process or offer to assist with daily activities if you can. If you live nearby, you might volunteer to do yard work, housework, walk the dog, babysit, or anything else you think might help them in their time of need. The key is to listen to their needs and offer the kind of support that will truly help them. If they live far away, you can send a note a few weeks later to ask how they are doing, which is a great way of extending the sentiment.
