subject: Win Him Back - Dealing With Your Ex's Bad Attitude [print this page] Win Him Back - Dealing With Your Ex's Bad Attitude
Are you trying to get your ex back but he's just being a jerk. Is he arrogant or does it drive you crazy when he snubs you or avoids you every time you see him? There are ways of turning this around and working it in your favor if you are serious about getting him back. There are ways of turning the table on him and making him regret being mean to you.
It might be tempting to give him a heaping helping of the same attitude that he gives you but why fuel the fire? Sure, you have a quick wit or maybe you really do want to give him a taste of his own medicine but where will that get you? Things will only get worse and you will only be giving him ammunition to use against you as a reason why he broke up with you in the first place. You don't want that, do you?
Kill Him With Kindness - This is an old saying and there's a reason for that. By being nice to him or at least polite you will make him look like a fool in front of anyone who might be watching. By killing him with kindness his friends and family will ask him why he is being so mean to you. The tide will start to turn a little bit and they might wonder who was actually at fault in your breakup.
The only down side of trying to be nice to him when he's being mean is that you do lose some value in his eyes and also in the eyes of the people around you. After all, who is nice to someone that broke up with them, broke their heart and continues to be mean to them. So, there is a balance that needs to be struck. Be nice without allowing your ex to use you. Set a boundary and if he steps over the line let him know that you are still a human being. Things may have not worked out between the two of you but you still deserve the same respect that he would give to any other human being.
Be Hurt - Let him and the people around you know that what he says and does hurts you. You have a heart, after all. You have feelings. You bleed the same as any other person and hurtful words wound you all the same as anyone else, if not more since it is the man that once loved you that is hurting you. Turn from him and walk away without a word to let him and everyone around you know that he has hurt you.
While you're not looking for sympathy or pity it sure beats being angry and lashing out at him and being wrong in your words and actions. After all, you are hoping to get him back and if you can push that emotional button of sympanty and empathy in him and his peers then why not use that to your advantage?
There will come a day when he regrets what he says and does. He will regret breaking up with you and when the time comes to ask for forgiveness you want him to be the one with things to regret and not you. You want to say that you behaved like an adult and that you never said or did anything hurtful towards him. You want him to be the one with the heart full of regrets and pain for hurting the one he loves... and that will be you one day soon.
The cycle of anger, lashing out and hurtful words can destroy what is left between the two of you and if you ever hope to get him back someone has to put a stop to the battle that still rages on between the two of you. If you ever hope to get him back you need to be the adult for a while and take control of the situation and the relationship.
