subject: Confessions Of A Flight Attendant II [print this page] Confessions Of A Flight Attendant II Confessions Of A Flight Attendant II
Hi mate! I am in London today and very chilly outside. As promised, a second batch of my daily endeavors will soon unfold before your eyes. Let's start.
There are lavatories in each zone. The aircraft is divided into zones. The mark to which a zone will end can be a bulkhead (like prefabricated walls), galleys, lavatories or simply a gap among rows. The interior design of the aircraft shares the same concept of comfort and convenience when you are at home. The only difference is that the aircraft is communal and the space is limited. You have to share with everybody who is most probably a stranger to you. You share the aisle, sometimes legroom and most of all the lavatories. Having established that, it is politeness to have it clean for the next person who will use it. Clean means your used tissue in the bin, and toilet is flushed from all evidences. Again, there are lavatories in each zone. If you still don't know where they are, feel free to ask and never pee on a bulkhead just like one of my passengers.
We collect jackets to be hung, used cups, glasses and trays after the service, money (just kidding!) but never your baby's diapers. Come on! Do I look like a garbage truck? Or your household helper or your company's janitor? Please know where to throw those pooped diapers. And never change nappies on the tray table of your seat, where your seat mates in the whole zone would be inhaling the odor of your baby's poop. I know this is common sense. But sometimes for some reason, passengers don't have it in the aircraft.
How to get the attention of a flight attendant? You are thirsty. There are no flight attendant's passing by. One trick that i will teach you is to press a button on your arm rest that has a figure of a person. This is called the flight attendant call button. A light will come on above you, signaling that you needed something. If nobody's coming to you, look if there are other tiny lights above the other's seats. If there are, chances are you will be accommodated after the service(if the service is ongoing)but I hope not. Now, if that won't work, you might have to go to one of the jumpseats or the galleys where the flight attendants usually convene. There might be a reason why nobody is paying attention to your call. If you see that they are galley gossiping, now is the time to be pissed off. Otherwise, consider the trip from your seat to the galley as exercise and a chance for your bum to be lifted from that seat. It's different If you are having an emergency, shout if you must! A passenger's life is our priority above everything else.
Will it hurt if you say please? I feel small when I'm being called by fingers snapping at my face or someone tugging my apron or calling my attention like I was their pet dog or cat. Worse, they don't say please. As if "please" would make them bleed or feel inferior. If you don't know my name because you can't read, you can always say, "Excuse me miss." Manners, manners!
Can you smile for 14 hours everyday? If you can, you must be the happiest person in the planet. Unfortunately for flight attendants, they are required to smile for the whole duration of their duty. Regardless, if someone is sick, somebody died, your parents are on the rocks or you just had a breakup. They leave their personal baggage at home. When they are at work, they should be professional enough to deal with their miseries, guilt, grief and inner trauma.
We don't change money. We do accept other major currencies as payment for sale items onboard. Money changing is not yet part of any airline inflight industry.
Bleeding and hunger. My flight was two hours away to its the destination. It was a six hour flight. Two hours have passed since we finished doing the meal service. One passenger was hysterical and was waving like a maniac in the aisle. As I approached him, he was pointing to his seat mate whose head was bleeding. I asked how it happened. He said when he opened the overhead compartment, one of the heavy briefcases fell on his seat mate's head. I was about to get the first aid kit when he stopped me and said, "Be quick. Give him something to eat. He is very hungry and 7 up." I was speechless!
