subject: How Do You Know if Your Marriage is Over? [print this page] How Do You Know if Your Marriage is Over?
It's never easy to be the one to stand up and say your marriage is over. Many people know that something is wrong but are not ready to say it's over. But, how do you know if your marriage is over? Is there some big bright blinking neon sign that says "marriage ends here?" Wouldn't it be so much easier if there was such a sign? The thing is that many couples struggle in limbo for a long time before anyone says anything. Resentment builds. Distances grow. Before you know it, you're both strangers occupying the same little bit of real estate. Even then though, is your marriage really over?
There's a saying in opera that sort of suits the situation. "It ain't over 'til the fat lady sings." Your marriage isn't over until both of you decide it's still over and that you're not willing to fight to save it. As long as one or both of you feel that there's something there worth your time, attention, and effort to save it, there's no reason to call it quits. Of course this leaves you with a very important question to ask of and answer for yourself. Are you ready for your marriage to be over?
For most folks, this is a TOUGH question to answer. No matter how much water you think has flowed beneath that bridge there is still part of you that loves the person you married. There's another part that believes the person you married loves you too. This leaves you both floating around a little longer in limbo. It's not good for you. It's not good for your marriage. And, it's not good for the person you love and married in the first place. But, is there anything you can do at this point to save your marriage?
Now THAT is a question worth asking!
You can save your marriage. It doesn't matter how much distance there is. If you're willing to put in the effort and it's going to take some effort then there is no reason at all why you can't make your marriage work this time around. You can even get your ex back if you've already said your goodbyes but you've changed your mind. There's nothing you can't accomplish to save your marriage as long as you're willing to do the time to make it happen and as long as there is love there on both sides of the equation.
