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subject: Ten Simple Communication Strategies For Divorced Folks [print this page]


Ten Simple Communication Strategies For Divorced Folks

One of the many challenges faced by divorced parents is that the dilemma of communicating with their kid's other parent. Although the parents have determined to divorce and finish their "personal" relationship, when youngsters are concerned, the dissolution of a marriage mirrors the top of a business relationship where the business partners (the fogeys) have created a product or asset (the youngsters) that continues to be after the termination of the business.

Even though the parents now not want to still "work along," they share the desire for his or her children (the priceless marital asset) to grow and thrive. Among other things, the success of the youngsters needs divorced oldsters to speak with every other concerning kid-targeted issues. So how do divorced parents communicate effectively regarding their kids when they are angry or upset or would merely rather not speak with their child's alternative parent ever again? Read on...

1. Whenever doable, communicate in writing. Writing gives you the chance to clarify your thoughts and specific yourself clearly. Additionally, within the event of a misunderstanding, everybody will return and observe what is written. E-mails and faxes have the advantage of getting a date and time embedded as well.

2. Stick with child-focused problems and keep your communication informative, not emotional.

3. Keep your communication clear. Use bullet points or numbers instead of paragraphs.

4. If an item requires a response, indicate when the response is necessary. Also state what action will be taken in the event the other parent does not respond. For example: Our son's category trip is on (date) and the price is ($X). The permission slip is due on (date). Please let me understand by (date) if this is often OK with you. If I do not hear from you, I will sign the permission slip and you and I will split the cost.

5. Don't use your communication as an chance to re-hash your feelings concerning the subjects you're writing about. Remember - this can be business communication concerning your children.

6. Divide your writing into sections like "old business," "new business" and "FYI."

7. Reply to communication from your kid's other parent as you would like to possess them reply to you. Be prompt and businesslike.

8. Use e-mail (and every one written communication) courteously. Don't write entirely in capital letters. Do not use boldface type. Don't use extraordinarily giant type. Do not use exclamation points. Keep far from sarcasm. Refrain from name calling and inappropriate language.

9. Take the initiative so neither parent becomes the "communication liaison." Youngsters's colleges, day care suppliers, extracurricular activity providers, etc. ought to have contact data for both parents. Each parent ought to receive notices from these sources. If that is not happening, the parent who isn't receiving the data can offer their contact information and get on the distribution list.

10. Investigate online programs like OurFamilyWizard and ShareKids for calendaring and communication. These programs are designed particularly for divorced parents.

There's a time and an area for your emotional unharness concerning your divorce, and, at the same time, there's a would like to conduct the business of raising your kids with somebody you would in all probability rather not speak to. Therefore how do you discover the strength to "take the high road" time when time and communicate calmly and effectively along with your kid's alternative parent?

Continuously bear in mind that your kid's wellbeing depends on what you are doing and the way you do it. It takes work to compartmentalize your emotions and put the requirements of your youngsters initial, however you'll do it. You are not alone - there are a number of resources on the market to assist you grow through divorce. Successful communication strategies are a nice addition to your post-divorce parenting toolkit.




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