subject: Stop Living in the Past – Look to the Future to Heal Your Marriage After Cheating [print this page] Stop Living in the Past Look to the Future to Heal Your Marriage After Cheating
Everywhere you look you can see couples who are living in the past and not working on building a future together. On your wedding day, if you can remember back that far, you were all bright and shiny and filled with hope for your future. Once the honeymoon ended things didn't look so lovely did they?
That's when cheating is the most likely to happen. Once upon a time it was called the seven year itch. Recent data indicates that it normally takes eight years rather than seven for bliss of matrimony to become the drone of the every day.
It becomes a matter of he said; she heard and vice versa.
She's frustrated because he doesn't do what she's asked (several times). She thinks he's not listening to her and that he definitely doesn't appreciate all the things she does for the sake of the marriage. So the first man that comes along with a sympathetic ear and mumbling the proper words of appreciation takes a little piece of her heart with him and has an easy time convincing her to forsake her vows to a husband who she is convinced doesn't really want her.
He's frustrated because she's nagging. A small battle of wills turns into a full own war and no one's taking prisoners. Your marriage becomes the casualty and the first woman offering the greener pastures of love (or sex to be specific) without strings becomes the new object of his affection.
It's so easy for your marriage to become a battlefield without either of you even really knowing what you're fighting over. In the end, if you aren't careful, your marriage is going to become the final casualty of this war.
How do you make things right?
Wouldn't it be great if you could mutter a few mystical magical phrases and snap your fingers to make everything right in your marriage? Unfortunately it doesn't work that way in the real work. You have to do a little more than that to save your marriage after cheating but you don't have to change who you are to make it happen.
Women show your man a little respect. Make him feel like the macho man you married. Change the way you ask him to do things and learn to show him the love in a way that lets him really feel the love from you.
Men learn to let your wife know just how much you do appreciate her. Become a better listener. Change the way you approach the things you don't want to do rather than ignoring or procrastinating.
Both of you will benefit from turning your eyes towards future plans so that you have a future in mind to look forward to instead of dwelling on things that have happened in the past that really aren't all that important any more. Make these small changes and watch closely to see how quickly your marriage takes a turn for the better.
