subject: Getting Your Ex Back After an Affair - Trust Has Been Shattered and Needs to Be Built Up Again! [print this page] Getting Your Ex Back After an Affair - Trust Has Been Shattered and Needs to Be Built Up Again!
Getting your ex back after an affair must be one of the hardest things to contend with. If you are the one who cheated, there are a few things you need to understand. First of all, that one very important element in a relationship, trust, has been completely and utterly shattered. The big question is, can this trust be built up again?
Then there is the other thing. It is not only your ex that has been affected by your cheating, but her friends and family as well. These are people that really care for your ex, so they probably don't have very fond thoughts about you at the moment. You hurt and betrayed someone that they love. Can you win back there affection and trust again?
Then there is you. Are you going to be able to live happily with yourself if you succeed at getting your ex back after an affair? Will you really be able to slip back into the life you had with your ex before, without having those feelings of being a total jerk for hurting your ex so much?
Your ex, if you DO get back together again, is going to be reminding you constantly about your infidelity, and is going to doubt your every word - are you going to be able to live with this for a long time?
What I suggest you do is first give your ex some space. Have enough respect for him/her to think this whole situation over carefully. When some time has passed, make contact with your ex, and ask him/her if there is any chance that the two of you can meet somewhere to have a talk.
If your ex slams the phone down in your ear, then accept this as a very clear NO, and don't bother your ex again. He/she is not going to listen to a word you say - you betrayed him/her once before, so who's to say that you aren't lying this time as well?
Then again you might be very lucky, and have your ex actually wiling to hear what you have to say. This is your one opportunity of getting your ex back after an affair, so I suggest that you do it with absolute sincerity. Tell your ex that you know you made the biggest mistake of your life, and want a chance to fix it. It is entirely up to your ex as to whether he/she is willing to give you another chance or not, so good luck.
