subject: Are Groomsmen Gifts Really Necessary? The Meaning Behind The Tradition [print this page] So youve finally worked up the nerve to take that leap of faith into the institution of marriage. You carefully searched your heart, begrudgingly waved goodbye to your bachelorhood, and proposed to your fair maiden. Congratulations! Now the real work begins - because youve got a wedding to help plan.
Sure, your bride, her mother, and her friends will take care of all the frilly stuff like centerpieces, dresses, and china patterns, but you do have some work ahead of you as well. You have to acquire a tuxedo. You have to plan a rehearsal dinner (or give moral support to your parents while they do it). You have to make absolutely sure that you dont schedule anything else on your wedding date (yes, it may be months in advance, but Ill play it by ear is not a recommended approach). Oh, and you have to choose your groomsmen as well and get them gifts.
You may be wondering, man, with all this intense planning and scheduling, will I really have time to pick out groomsmen gifts? Maybe I can let that one slide.
Probably not a good idea. The most obvious reason is that these guys are your close friends and/or family and if you skip out on a groomsmen gift, theyll never let you live it down.
But to fully appreciate the role of groomsmen, you have to understand the history of the tradition. Centuries ago, Anglo-Saxon weddings utilized groomsmen (who were called brides knights back then) to guard the bride on her wedding-related journeys. It was the job of these men to escort the bride and make sure that she arrived safely at the wedding and later at the home of her betrothed with her dowry, health, and virtue intact. In other words, these gentlemen were tasked with accompanying an innocent maiden, who was completely alone except for her riches, on long journeys which could last for days and were prohibited from laying a finger on her.
Needless to say, this monumentally difficult charge garnered a great deal of respect and admiration for those who accepted the responsibility (and completed the mission successfully). The groomsmens job was made even dicier if the marriage did not have the blessing of the brides family. In that case, it was often necessary for the groom to kidnap the bride thus putting the onus on the groomsmen to fend off the angry mob as the groom made his escape with his lady.
Suffice it to say that the job of groomsmen has always been an important one; and that remains true today (though on a lesser scale). Not only can your groomsmen assist you with your mind-boggling list of pre-wedding chores, they can also arrange that other all-important premarital tradition: the bachelor party!
Groomsmen are generally very eager to formulate a celebration that helps you bid a proper adieu to your bachelor lifestyle. On the day of your wedding, your groomsmen will also make sure that you arrive at the church punctually and properly attired (if you somehow accidentally scheduled an event on your wedding day, they will make the proper excuses for your absence). They also escort the bridesmaids into and/or out of the church, and are responsible for helping you stay upright should nerves overwhelm you during the wedding ceremony itself. After the reception, the groomsmen may tend to such details as gathering wedding gifts, loading luggage into vehicles, or decorating the getaway car. But arguably the most burdensome assignment for your groomsmen comes during the reception, when they may be forced to converse (or even dance) with unescorted guests or bridesmaids in an effort to make the event as pleasant for every guest in attendance.
The good news for you is that there is a vast array of choices available to you when selecting a suitable groomsmen gift for your wedding party. Perhaps the most enduring theme associated with groomsmens gifts over the years has been one of drinking and merriment. In this vein, a gift of a distinguished flask, crystal decanter, brass cocktail shaker, or fancy mug, stein, or shot glass may be appropriate. Or you may opt for a more traditional approach with a gift that is slightly more formal. Cuff links, pocketknives, or money clips may be given as groomsmens gifts to men who value style and fashion. But if your relationship with your groomsmen leans toward frivolity and leisure, there are a myriad of options for you as well. Watches, funny signs or plaques, lighters, sports accoutrements, and even shirts or beverage holders may be better suited to your fun-loving group.
Whichever route you choose, you should strongly consider getting the items personalized for each groomsman. Almost all of the abovementioned presents can be engraved, etched, or printed with a name, initial, and/or phrase which pertains to each individual recipient. The personalization adds a special touch to each gift and more clearly displays your gratification to your groomsmen. Because not only are these fine gents performing numerous important tasks on your wedding day, they are also testifying to your character, virtue, and high caliber to the rest of the world on what will be the most memorable day of your life. That in itself is worth the price and effort of acquiring groomsmens gifts.
