subject: Being In A Relationship [print this page] Relationships are always changing, as the people in them are always changing and growing. At different ages, different life cycles, we have different interests. Couples do not always have to have the same interests, but when they are different, it is important to accept and support each others interests. (As long as they are healthy interests.)
It is easy when couples share the same interests, when they are able to happily spend quality time together (be it watching sports or taking dance classes), but it is just as easy to grow apart when they are different. One may feel left out or left behind, and that is why it is important to encourage each other to grow and be the best person he/she can be. And that is when relationships grow stronger.
In the beginning couples often pretend to have the same interests (women may pretend to like football or basketball) to be liked, but as relationships -- and the people in it -- develop and mature, they should feel confident to become their own person and pursue their own interests. Couples in healthy relationships should encourage each other as personal growth leads to higher self esteem, which in turn leads to success and better well-being. Couples have to remember that they are on the same team: their partners successes are their success, and vice versa. Higher self esteem leads to more confidence and optimism, those with higher self esteem are more likely to reach their goals.
Self esteem also becomes an important factor to the health of relationships. It affects communication, and many people believe that good communication skills are the most important thing in a healthy, long-lasting relationship. Low self esteem can lead to irritability, hostility, and hypersensitivity. When in an argument, it is important to talk out what is bothering us (I dont appreciate it when you dont call if youre gonna be late or I dont appreciate that you dont help out around the house), but in pointing out things that bother us, someone with low self esteem may be over sensitive to it and think that we are criticizing them.
