subject: Check Mating [print this page] A sign which was perched above one of the multitudinous gentlemen's clubs had the words: free girl games. All other signs were guttural and vulgar, which is to say neon, but the sign I was looking at was Spartan, with simple black letters etched into a reddish wood that looked like mahogany. It was a sign that belonged over the doorways of an investment bank. I was curious, so went in.
A guy who looked muscular enough to kick King Kong's ass was the bouncer. The cover charge was $500. I coughed it up.
Inside, it looked like smoker's club. Had that cozy, 18th-century library feel which such places do. Dark, dim lighting, high backed leather chairs.
If the women had been any hotter they would have spontaneously combusted. None had a single visible tattoo, or trampy stiletto heels. They were the kind of women the Federal Reserve Open Market Committee might want at a stag party.
The men present were all powerful, wore it lightly, as such men usually do. Their lust was subdued, not brandished as in cheaper places, but nonetheless hung in the air like a scent.
All the women were dressed, all were alluring.
A massive, massive chessboard dominated the room. Living pieces filled it, all were women, all were dressed in medieval costumes as a specific chess piece. I tried not to gape at the pawn nearest me. Only about 5'2", she had breasts I wanted to bring Monet back to life to paint, and a stunning face. It's not like I'd never seen a hot woman before, but she was easily one of the 5 or 6 all-time most beautiful. Except for the rest of the pieces of ass on the board, of course. They were just as hot.
The two Kings were the only male pieces. They were the players apparently. They moved by escorting the piece to its new position. The women always sauntered in such a teasing and flirtatious way that conversation stopped.
A bishop took a knight. The knight left the board, went to a small bed in a corner. The curtains were closed, a man entered. By listening, I realized he had bid on her. She soon moaned, they had sex, no one looked over or acted as if they noticed.
The Queens were both tall and could have been supermodels, and I'm not exaggerating even a tiny bit. They were the two most beautiful women I'd seen, and the only women that made me believe the Helen launched a thousand ships story might actually be true.
It was explained to me that the Queens could not be bid on. Who could argue that they were priceless? The guy that explained it to me was so upper crust and demure that he was probably genetically incapable of growing angry. It was further explained that this chess game was held but two times a year. Suddenly the cover made sense. Twice a year, each solstice. Mr. Demure explained that the Queens were the madams who owned the establishment. They had never sold themselves, ever, not even once. Excepting a first marriage of one. They could not be bought, only won twice a year. If you had seen how hot they were first hand, you'd realize what a brilliant marketing gimmick that was.
Any male who paid for an entire night with one of the women was entered in a drawing. This drawing determined who would be the two Kings at the next chess gathering. The two Kings played a real game of chess, the winner got to be with the Queen of his choosing. Only for one encounter, not the entire evening.
A king moved himself to where the enemy Queen stood, and took her. He said check mate and allowed his glance to linger on the body of the Queen. Every man in the room wanted to salivate with jealously, I promise you. This lucky monarch had won the free girl games. He proceeded to take the Queen again.
