subject: Contributing Factors To The Loneliness In Men [print this page] Men may hide their emotions a lot, but that in no way means they don't have them. In fact, loneliness, while it can seem like a facade of impenetrability is actually a result of depression. The inability to get close to another person is rooted in a fear of failure and rejection that keeps some men lonely as a defense mechanism. With more and more loneliness out there in the world today, men suffer from locking everything up inside of them and thinking that no attention is good attention. If you are a man struggling with loneliness, or if you know one who is, the only way to get help is to know what some of the contributing factors to loneliness are. Here are some of the most common:
A bad breakup
When men go all in with a commitment, they step out of their carefully forged comfort zone of invulnerability. They lay their souls bare, at least more so than they are used to, and that act of "putting themselves out there" brings with it a great deal of risk. If all goes well, they are on cloud nine, top of the world. Should the relationship fall through, they think they have failed some way as a man, and it can be a great contributor to never taking a step towards commitment again. Men do not like to feel like failures, same as women. But rather than seeking validation the way that many women do when faced with loneliness, they are more apt to withdraw in a vain attempt at avoiding further rejection.
Sexual problems
One of the biggest causes of loneliness in guys can come through a decreased ability to perform sexually. Men place so much importance on their sexual identities that if there is an issue, they tend to hide from physical intimacy, and that can cause a serious rift in their relationships. When that aspect of a man's personality has been compromised, he can find himself doing things to sabotage his relationships. Without an understanding partner, he may not even have to do anything for his relationship to suffer. Regardless of what the cause is, once the relationship has been compromised through sexual intimacy problems, a man is far less likely to open himself up for a close bond thereafter, and that can cause even more problems with regards to loneliness.
Past family experiences
Men are known for modeling their own ideas of a successful relationship based on what their mother and father had. If they received improper modeling growing up, then they are more likely to choose loneliness over the risk of a breakup.
By knowing what the contributing factors are, more men can avoid a life of loneliness.
