subject: Self Esteem [print this page] Knowing about High Self Esteem Knowing about High Self Esteem
These days we hear a lot of talk about self esteem. It means what do we think of ourselves. Regardless of if our view of ourselves is good or bad, it is mirrored back to us by others and validates and strengthens our own view. The self esteem we have can effect how we behave towards people and in turn how they respond to us. When we constantly self deprecate it can cause us to feel undeserving, fretful and dejected. We need to have respect for ourself and others to have good self esteem. Treating others the way you should treat yourself or the way you would like to be treated is a good starting point for self improvement.
Be Aware of your own Thoughts
Comparing yourself unfavourably with others engenders low self esteem. If we spend much of our time focusing this way it can bring about an inferiority complex and thus becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. People who bully others or make a joke at somebody elses expense are more than likely to be those with poor self esteem. By disparaging another they may believe that they are somehow in a position of superiority. Nobody will find this sort of behaviour appealing but conversely if you are a happy and caring person you will attract others to you. Believe that you are a good person and be proud of yourself. We all have individual talents so know what they are and develop those.
Learn to Like Yourself
When we do not have good self esteem it may hold us back from expressing our true thoughts for fear of being judged or ridiculed. Find out how to release stress, using your subconscious mind, and become informed so that you are better able to form your own views. Then give yourself the freedom to express your own thoughts and ideas with self assurance. When you feel self assured about your own convictions you will no longer feel the urge to be in agreement with other people's opinions purely to feel their acceptance or to have their friendship. It is not possible to be all things to all people so just be the best you can be learn to like yourself and accept that not everybody in the world will necessarily like you. A helpful saying is What you think about me is none of my business. Try not to focus on what anybody else may think of you just focus on believing and behaving as though you love yourself and you are the BEST. If necessary, "fake it till you make it". Take responsibility for yourself. Its what you think of yourself that really counts and the rest will follow.
Sometimes it can be challenging to look to the future and not focus on past bad events. It is not possible for us to just eliminate the bad times we have all experienced from our memory. We can only change our attitude and what we choose to think about as we can not change what has happened in the past. Do not waste precious time stewing over negative events in the past but rather develop enthusiasm and love of life. Self pity is a waste of time so do not play the victim in life.
Pursue Outside Interests
Pursue outside interests possibly sports, gym, social clubs, nature walks, music concerts, being involved in the community. Doing something like this is really useful for self improvement and will help to improve your self esteem. Be prepared to move from your usual area of familiarity to try something different and express an interest in others. Show courtesy and politeness. Clear clutter from your life and maintain high standards of cleanliness and dress.
Low self esteem may also mean seeking constant reassurance from others and allowing ourselves to be treated badly. If others treat us badly it can reinforce low self esteem. Learn to have self love and to politely accept any praise you receive. Set yourself achievable goals.
Treat yourself fairly and kindly. Forgive yourself and encourage yourself when you make mistakes we all make them its part of the learning process in order to do better next time. None of us are perfect and we all have good and bad points as well as good and bad days.
Singing Your Own Praises
Being arrogant or full of self-importance is not what having good self esteem is about. When people have good self esteem they have an inner confidence and it is not necessary to brag.
Being aware of the way we speak to ourselves is paramount and it is important to interrupt any negative self talk and turn it around to be positive. We all have that little inner voice which speaks to us constantly. With practice it will become easier to have positive self talk and also when there is an awareness of the way we speak to ourselves.
Do not allow any creeping self-doubt to block your progress and success in life. With constant awareness and practise you can eventually achieve good self esteem.
