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subject: Save My Married Life - Do It Rightly In Five Means [print this page]


When you committed yourself to marriage, you bought yourself a ticket for a roller coaster ride that only death can stop. You will go through both exhilarating and sickening periods, bad and good times and bold and cowardly days. As long as youre willing to stick with each other through thick or thin, your marriage will continue to work out. Otherwise, your marriage will suffer and worse, you might eventually break up.

To avoid the reactive question, "How will I save my marriage?" be proactive in handling your union and in keeping your sacred promise. Below are five guidelines on how to carry out this positive approach.

Marriage requires communication.

Communication must be a two-way street in marriage. Intimacy and connection develop from disclosure of thoughts, hopes, ideas and dreams. However, it would be ineffective if you fail to grasp the exact message of your spouse. To know what he/she truly means, listen with your ears and eyes. The body language will tell you what the words couldnt.

Utilize healthy silence.

When both of you are at the height of anger and frustration, you end up saying nasty things to each other. When you find yourself in this kind of situation, just be quiet. Let the negative feelings ebb first; otherwise, you blurt out lines you might regret later. As you think silently, reflect on how you can convey your ideas without hurting your partners feelings.

Marriage keeps the fire.

Spend quality time with your partner on a regular basis. If its alright with your parents or friends, you can leave your children with them for an hour or two. Do things you used to do before you tied the knot. Dont stop sending love notes, exchanging gifts and throwing surprises. Look at your partner in the eyes once in a while and tell him/her you still feel the spark. Little things like these can prevent you from experiencing the difficult save-my-marriage battle.

Marriage means compromising.

You will not agree with your spouse at all times. You want to order steak but he/she asserts sweet and sour fish. You suggest you jog together in the park but he/she feels too tired to do it. You want to send your child to a private school but he/she worries about the high tuition. When you have different opinions and preferences, make a compromise. Reach an agreement and gladly fulfill whatever your deal is.

Marriage is an investment.

Treat your marriage like its a business you own. If youre responsible for it, youll try out all the options to nurture it. You will continually assess the situation, examine the problems and foresee the threats to keep it from failing. You will feel proud of its achievements and mileposts too. Expectedly, it will get special attention from you.

Dont wait for your marriage to get miserable to deserve your attention. Give your union ample attention, address your and your partners needs and resolve your relationship issues to prevent any save-my-marriage battle.

by: Belle Smith




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