subject: How Self Help Can't Get Help [print this page] Most service providers and helping professionals, coaches, consultants, or change agents get into business by accident. Here is how it often looks.
Sally is unhappy.
She wants to change her life.
She seeks support to change her life.
She gets it.
She likes it.
She wants to give back -- wants to be a part of the same.
Uh oh -- now I am in business.
And then what happens next becomes a series of decisions towards growing or dying. The self-help you received that got you moving, taking action, and being the person that wants to bring that to others becomes the monster under the bed.
You believe all you have learned, but in business you have to model it. You have to live it as a model or business is very lonely and a lonely business is a broke business. Here are the four areas that I see self-help folks not helping themselves, and it is not only hurting their business it is killing an industry from its highest level of transformation.
1) Paranoia: There isn't enough. Lack. Fear of Competition. You can't teach abundance and then make decisions from a place of fear that others might be taking your share. Are you aware there is no competition? IF you are being who you really are and not an imitation of that person then you are aware competition does not exist.
2) Pseudo - celebrity: There is a belief that if I can feel or look important, I can get attention and money. The truth is, you are only important when you represent you true self. No celebrity status will ever feel as good as real feels.
3) Wrong reasons: Most people get into business by love or accident. There is something you love doing so much that you want to do it all the time OR something was fulfilled or changed on you, and you want to carry that help and healing forward. So, here the problem presents itself. You do the work for the love, attention, healing, or transforming YOU need. Not the help or support THEY need. When you use your business to fill a void no one gets served.
4) Motivation: You should only have two motivations. Care and Cash. Gary V says if you want to have a great business that serves and makes lots of money--care about people. Take the focus off of all the BS and things that don't matter and focus on what does. Care about people and build a model that makes cash. Everything else is your ego manipulating the self-help you need.
Business is simple. Life is simple. Success is simple. But if your intentions and motivations are wrong you can't serve anyone. You are only serving yourself. Self-help should start by helping themselves first. If you want to change the world you start by changing yours.
