subject: Why is it so Painful to Try to Rebuild Your Marriage After Cheating [print this page] You expect the pain when you find out your spouse has cheated. You expect to suffer a little while afterwards but why does the rebuilding process of giving your marriage a second chance hurt so much?
Pain is an important part of the process of getting that second chance you want for your marriage. It doesn't matter if you were the one who cheated or the one who was cheated on, there are painful memories that are going to have to be confronted, dealt with, and put to rest during the rebuilding process if your marriage is going to have any hope at all of succeeding this time around.
Cheating is hard on marriages but it is rarely the only problem in the marriage. In fact, cheating is usually a symptom of the problem rather than the problem itself. Cheating is usually the one final cry for help in a marriage that has problems that are either not being recognized or simply not being dealt with.
Cheating is rarely a sign that there is no love left in the marriage though that is certainly a possibility. People generally don't make it to the rebuilding process though if the love has completely evaporated from the marriage. It's that love and the fact that you do love one another in spite of everything that makes it possible for this to hurt so much.
Keep that in mind as you deal with the pain you are feeling. If you didn't love each other it wouldn't hurt like this at all. I know it's a small comfort; but, it is a comfort.
Part of the process in getting your second chance at marriage after cheating is healing old wounds so that they do not become a problem in your marriage this time around. You may think it's unnecessary but that is not the case at all. Until the old issues that caused problems for your marriage are dealt with and put to rest, never to be spoken of again, you can't even think about moving forward.
Putting them to rest may be hard. It may be hurtful. But until you confront all these demons of the past the future is simply going to keep repeating itself time and time again. Talk, cry, work it out, and then lock it away and throw away the key so that the painful rebuilding process can find joy and peace for your happily ever after.
Why is it so Painful to Try to Rebuild Your Marriage After Cheating
