subject: How To Control Feelings Of Anxiety After Discovering Spouse's Affair? - 3 Tips On How To Do It [print this page] Are you wonderinghow to control your feelings of anxiety after discovering your spouse's affair? Here are three tips you can use to help yourself feel better instantly...
Tip #1: Pinpoint what is causing you to feel anxious
Your feelings are a response to the thoughts you are thinking in the moment. But what thoughts are those?
You need to find out by becoming aware of your thoughts.
One effective way to become more aware of your thoughts is to buy yourself a journal and write down your thoughts. (An added benefit of doing this: is it gives you a safe outlet to express the tension and anxiety you feel inside.)
After recording the thoughts that surface as you'refeeling anxious, you can then take a second look at it and see if you can notice the patterns in your train of thought. Sometimes, just noticing that you have these thoughts is enough to help you "snap out of it". Other times, you may need to talk to yourself and help yourself understand that there is a better way of viewing your current circumstances.
Tip #2: Release the need to control the things that are out of your control
No matter what you do, there will always be things that are out of your control. For example, you cannot control the actions of other people - this includes your spouse, your children, your parents, etc. Even if you are able to limit their behavior in the short-term, you need to accept that there is no way for you to have ultimate control over them.
The sooner you accept this fact, the easier your life will be.
However, to help relieve your anxious feelings, it a good idea to sit down and calmly discuss with your spouse what are some guidelines you would like them to follow. Don't force it on your spouse, but let them know what you would prefer so there is a beginning point for better communication and understanding between you two.
Once you've discussed some guidelines, allow yourself to relax and focus on doing activities that please you instead.
Tip #3: Remind yourself that these anxious feelings are temporary
That's the interesting thing about feelings, isn't it? You can be laughing one moment and then crying the next in the blink of an eye. If all depends on what you're focusing on in that moment.
If you feel yourself becoming anxious, distract yourself by watching a comedy, or play with your pet, or scream into a pillow, etc. Once you show yourself that your feelings are temporary, you'll notice that your anxious feelings pass by more quickly and you can breathe easy again.
How To Control Feelings Of Anxiety After Discovering Spouse's Affair? - 3 Tips On How To Do It
