subject: Why Is This Guy Still Alive [print this page] I want to talk about the mother confessor for all these terrorists, including 9/11 members, the Ft. Hood Monster, and now this stupid Nigerian, radicalized in London, while supposedly studying for a degree.
His name is Anwar al Awlaki, and he used to preach right here in my backyard in northern Virginia, at what is called the prominent Dar al-Hijrah Mosque,before blowing town in the middle of the night, ventually ending up in Yemen, where he runs an Al Queda recruitment center on the internet.
Now supposedly we had killed this guy a couple of weeks back with a drone attack, thats what was announced anyway, and then lo and behold, he shows up on the radar again after the thwarted attempt by the goofy Nigerian to turn himself into charcoal. Youd think Jimmy Carter was running the operation. (But he was busy apologizing for his nasty anti-Semetic remarks, so we know it wasnt him. Yes, the Nobel Peace Prize recipient is Jewphobic, and he has been given a pass for way too long on this.)
So the failed operation has to be attributed to the current commander, Mr. Dithers, who is busy in Hawaii, spending more of his book money.
Let's think about this for a minute.
We cant locate a traitor in Yemen?
And then take him out?
We should be able to find this guy with a couple of good dog teams. (And my apologies to the dogswho have to smell this pig up close. I would grant them Beggin Strips for life.)
Now we did take out a number of Al Queda operatives with the drone, which is always a good thing, but we need to make sure we get this guy and douse him with pork blood before we send him off to the big BBQ in the sky, which serves pig 100 different ways 24 hours a day.
Its a place where everybody knows your name, which in this case would be Arnold, just like on Green Acres. And all the waitresses are at least 65, and weigh 200 pounds or more. They also carry Mace Pepper Gel in their aprons, and have the green light to hit old Anwar everytime they walk by, which is often, because if you think BBQ is popular here, wait till you get upstairs.
Now for the dumbass Nigerian.
I say we give him what he wants. We go back and find some old Burn Baby Burn signs, and then build a nice bonfire on some glass littered lot in Detroit, which shouldnt be hard to find. We soak his clothes in pig blood, and get a good crust on them.
Then on New Years Eve, as the clock winds down, we set the pile on fire, beaming the whole thing around the world. Unlike Commander Dithers, we know who the enemy is, and how to deal with them.
