subject: Struggling To Comprehend Abandonment Disorder And Borderline Personality? [print this page] Have you ever questioned yourself about the grounds and causes of the Abandonment Disorder and BPD?
To start with, during our first years of life we rely on our genitors and/or caregivers to grand not just our body needs, but also affectional and mental demands. This is the argument why nature has devised that particular relationship between the parents and the child, known as attachment.
When this attachment is secure, the child feels protected since his or her wants are answered by his or her loving and caring parents.
However not all families are like this. In the insecurely attached families children are treated in ways that are emotionally cold, repudiating, downing, or utterly insulting.
Children who are brought-up in such families have to deal with acute and intense feelings of frustration and abandonment. These children are fearful, timorous, are criticizing themselves, are self-downing, and have low self-confidence.
If the relationship with the parents will not warm up and those core demands aren't met, this sense of left alone will change later in an abandonment disorder emblematic for borderline personalities.
In short this apprehension of abandonment affirms that all people will behave similar to one's caregivers did during upbringing.
Of course this assumptionis not supported in reality, nonetheless this is the internal reality of the BPD sufferer and one will behave and relate in life correspondingly.
Nonetheless, considering that these assertions are arbitrary and/or acquired, they can be altered with new realistic ones.
Therefore the way to achieve this is to uncover first the exact thoughts, beliefs, and thinking patterns. This abandonment fear rose up in a relationship, so it will manifest when relating with others.
One beneficial tip you may want to implement is to go back mentally to your childhood and find out the motives that made your caregivers to act that way with you. Determine the causes based on what you know about them, their personality, profession, early years, or their parents.
When you got that, enquire yourself why would you incriminate yourself when you now have the facts proving that you have in fact nothing to do with it?
And consequently why would you think that all people will act the same with you simply because your mom & dad or dear ones did?
Just answer to these enquiries and you will definitely begin to experience things from a different perspective.
