subject: Has Your Spouse Cheated? You Can Work Things Out - Or Maybe Not! [print this page] It is often said that marriage cannot survive after a spouse has cheated. We always assume that working things out will lead to frustration and doubts. In the middle of all the mixed emotions that come into place, we feel desperate and hopeless and often caught between anger and guilt.
After the shock of realizing a spouse has cheated reality sets in. It is not uncommon to experience guilt from the spouse that cheated and the desperate effort to work things out to avoid the break up of the family from the faithful one. At this stage couples often wonder if they can work things out.
It is definitely possible to save your marriage after a spouse cheated. It is also very important to understand that this is by no means a quick and easy road to travel. There are some points to be considered in order to successfully work things out and build a stronger relationship.
To be able to overcome all the obstacles that come from an experience such spouse infidelity we have to work on the facts that led up to the cheating in order to avoid future re-occurrences. Getting to the root of the problem is always a more effective and realistic approach. By avoiding the unanswered questions and ignoring our feelings after realizing a spouse has cheated we open doors to resentment, doubt, and total lack of trust.
Once we acknowledge the root of the problem it is important to restore the trust. This is only possible by working on the consequences that came once the spouse cheated. Success can be achieved by overcoming the insecurities on both parts and erasing doubt and resentment. To be able to work things out we need to get over the affair.
Intimacy is an important part of the process but it can only be recovered once we treat the causes and consequences of the problem. By having a more positive view of the future we boost our self-esteem and intimacy gradually falls into place.
Many couples do work things out after a spouse has cheated and in many cases claim that the experience has made their relationship even stronger. This can be very reassuring because we can finally conclude that we have some control over difficult situations. Cheating does not have to be the end of a relationship. It will all depend on the choices we make.
Has Your Spouse Cheated? You Can Work Things Out - Or Maybe Not!