subject: Mature Dating Means Letting Go Of The Past [print this page] No one likes to be at odds with those around us unless of course this person is someone who thrives on conflict. So, when you desire to be involved in mature dating relationships, how do you handle your connections to your ex-partners?
One important key issue is to be at peace with your past to the best of your own ability and don't burn your bridges. If you are currently involved in a new relationship and want to experience mature dating to the fullest, then you should not be in contact with your ex-partner. There is a difference in having friendly relations with someone and being his or her best friend. You do not want to offend your current partner with still remaining close to your ex-partner. That type of behavior is not right and should not be allowed when you are trying to be involved in a mature dating relationship.
When you are in a mature dating relationship, your partner should be your number one priority and this person is special to you and you do what is necessary to make the relationship a success. If you are hanging onto the past and daydreaming about the ex-partners that you had and are desirous of still staying connected to them in a way that compromises your relationship with your current partner, then you are behaving immaturely. Your current partner deserves to be treated with respect and with your complete devotion, as you also deserve to be treated.
It's noteworthy to mention that you want to remain in friendly relations with your ex-partners but not in constant best friend mode. That can only ruin the potential you have for success in your new relationship with your current partner. Obviously, if you were divorced or in a committed relationship and you have children with this ex-partner, you will be on more speaking terms than if you didn't have children with this person. You need to keep those lines of communication open for the sake of your children, but nothing more. If your relationship with your ex-partner has ended, then it's ended and you both need to move on to a new future and to find new love.
If you don't completely sever those ties with your ex-partner, you will have one foot in the past and one foot in the present and you won't be going anywhere but will be stuck in limbo. That is not fair to your ex-partner, to your current partner or to you. One will be holding your arm on the left side of the fence and the other person will be holding your arm on the right side of the fence. They will be pulling you in two different directions and until you let go of the person from the past holding onto your arm, you will never be fully able to enjoy the present life of blessing that is just waiting for you to embrace with your current partner. That is what a mature dating relationship is all about, knowing when to let go of the past and embrace the present and your future together.
