subject: Cheating Isn't Good For Marriages But The Aftermath Can Be [print this page] Cheating as something good for the marriage is not being advertised in here. For in real life, cheating creates havoc in a number of marriages every day. Records show that it is really in bad state at the moment more so with the numbers seem to be forever increasing with the piling up of stress both from the economy and the social dynamics where more women worldwide are joining the workforce.
Cheating isn't good for relationships. But, when the two of you get together and decide to work things out and really get the conversation started about your future together, the results of the cheating can be good for your relationship. Here are a few things that need to happen if you really want to make your marriage as wonderful as it can possibly be after cheating nearly ripped it apart.
1)Arrange for a long and a no-nonsense conversation of the things that you would need from each other. There is no perfect marriage out there but with compromises one can have the best marriages that could possibly be obtained. You both have necessities and there are of course that you wanted. It is your task now to unearth a way to get all those needs and some of those wants you each have. It is the sincerity on your efforts to hold things on your own part in the bargain that would lead your relationship on its path to greatness.
2)Do away with impossible expectations. Each of us has our own vision of what a married life will have to be. Since childhood we envisioned ourselves in this picture perfect life and had worked things towards that end. What a discontentment we may have felt when we get to face the reality not according to our expectations. There is a need for you to move on and face the reality of marriage that you have instead of grieving the absence of the post card ready image of the marriage that you dreamed of.
3)Plan your lives together - together. Marriages need goals and a destination. It's not good for your marriage to be in complete limbo with no direction to move towards. At the same time, you can't leave all the planning and goal setting to one person. Otherwise you'll be going somewhere you're not interested in going and complaining after the wheels are set in motion. You both need to participate in the planning of your goals and in taking the necessary steps to meet those goals as well. Setting goals you both agree upon and working together to meet them gives you both a common purpose, something to look forward to, and eliminates much of the temptation to cheat.
