subject: Empty Nest: Time To Spread Your Wings [print this page] As our children grow from infants to young adults, we steadfastly teach the all the things they need to know in order to be productive and self-sufficient adults. Once that goal is reached, however, many parents find that they experience conflicting feelings about this life change. As our children become adults, they need us less. In turn, we have less to think about; less to do to occupy the time.
Not only can parents actually experience grief at this time; but they can experience lesser emotions such as fear or a sense of loss of authority. Mothers who devoted themselves fully to raising their children may be stricken with the feeling that they are now useless; their purpose has been fulfilled and now what is left?
Living in an empty nest can be an adjustment that takes some time. However, when you venture out to learn new things and take on new challenges, you may find that you are heading into the most exciting time in your life.
One idea for the mom who needs some new activities is to get out and get active. Self defense training is the ultimate tool to institute the kind of change a mom may need at this stage in life. To learn self defense takes commitment and time, which she has. But in turn, to learn self defense also leaves you with a sense of power much like a mother may experience when she watches over her brood. Through self defense training, you learn to be your own protector. Through self defense training, you empty out emotions and stresses and gain exercise and insight into yourself. What better way to spend some of your free time?
Couples whose children have all taken flight may be left with discomfort at their new status. For years, conversations were peppered (or consumed) with issues surrounding parenting and family life. Vacations were planned around the entire family; usually with mom and dads preferences coming in last. Now that it is just the two of you again, what will you talk about; what will you do?
The answer to that question is vast and never ending: you can do whatever you want. This should sound liberating, but for many it is simply terrifying. Talk to your spouse about some of the things you would like to do together. Spend time dreaming, much the way you did when you were first married. If it helps, each of you sit down and make a list of the things you would like to do in life.
When making a list of things you would like to do, include small and large activities. Maybe this is the perfect time to take a second honeymoon. Maybe its a time for each spouse to take on a hobby of their own and seek personal development individually. Activities can be itemized in categories of things you would do as a couple and things you may pursue individually.
When the children grow up and start their own lives, it doesnt mean you are left behind. Find new opportunities and your life can gain new meaning and excitement.
