subject: Holiday Stress, Preparation And Care Giving. [print this page] Whether youre providing care for a family member, a client or just taking care of yourself, the holiday time is a stressful time. There are questions and worries that are lingering under the surface and sometimes if not managed can creep up to the surface and show up as frustration and anger. Where and who will you spend it with? Are you emotionally prepared to spend time with relatives that you miss or dont miss? How are you going to find time to shop for and wrap gifts? What should you buy for whom? Things become even more stressful when youre the one hosting Christmas Dinner. When you consider all thats required to do along with taking care of another it seems unfathomable even for the most competent host or hostesses.
Taking care of another for many is already an extraordinary task. Its a full time job onto itself. Caregiver burn out is a real and it happens to even the most compassionate and supportive people regardless of added holiday pressures.
Before we continue, acknowledge yourself for being a hero to someone who may or may not appreciate all that you do for them. Perhaps youre a mom caring for your children and YOUR mom and dad. Perhaps youre a single dad, trying to take care of your mom. Likely youre part of the sandwich generation where youre caring for a parent and children.
Its hard to imagine, but consider for a moment that the people youre caring for are so wrapped up their own suffering that they dont even have the expectation of anything grand! My experience in working with the elderly and the young is that unless they themselves are directing the care, and how they want something prepared they tend to be very satisfied with just being comfortable.
When youre comfortable with a client or family member, they are often comfortable with you. When care is needed, it requires a concerted effort and takes priority over everything else. Because you know your loved ones care is very important and takes priority, it makes it very difficult to even think about buying gifts and preparing a fabulous holiday meal.
Right now, take a few moments and take in 4 to 7 deeps breathes and exhale all the way. To take care of another, its important to take care of yourself also. When youre relaxed, you will feel better and so will the one youre caring for.
Here are some tips to relieve stress during the holiday season when caring for another:
1.Consider involving the recipient of care in the decision making and preparation process. You may find they dont want to do anything significant for the holiday.
2.Consider outsourcing your efforts. Its okay to ask for help. If a more significant meal and tree are required and youre caring for another, ask for help. Most agencies will be happy to extend a helping hand. Neighbors will also. You would be surprised, if you told the vender what your challenges are, they may volunteer to deliver and even set up a Christmas tree for you and your loved one to decorate.
3.There was a time when gifts were hand made and shared with relatives. Consider your strengths and the strengths of the one youre caring for. Can you create crafts together and share them with others? The time making simple crafts or cards could be very enjoyable.
4.Brownies and other treats wrapped in foil with a small hand made card would be well received and appreciated by most.
5.If youre the one who is hosting, consider making the main dish be it ham or turkey and asking friends and relative to bring a dish. Perhaps you and the one youre caring for can make a wish list and ask relatives to help by bringing them to you. You can even ask your relatives for help by coming early to set the table and set up while you care for your loved one.
Perhaps you see a theme here: Ask for help! Its difficult to do it all by yourself and no one expects you to be everything to everyone. Cut yourself some slack and allow the support in. Nicely assert and express your needs. Let others know support would be appreciated. There are many people around that are eager and willing to help, just ask.
