subject: How To Stop Your Breakup and Immediately Reverse It [print this page] It always happens from out of nowhere..It always happens from out of nowhere... your boyfriend or girlfriend sits you down, places a hand over your own, and utters those famously hated words:"I think we should break up..."
Confusion. Panic. Fear. Your world is turned upside down in an instant, and suddenly everything is in disarray. Your job, your school, nothing else matters except one thing: getting your ex boyfriend or girlfriend back again. And so you focus all your efforts with laser-like precision on that one goal, in a desperate attempt to stop your breakup from happening.
Sound familiar? This type of scenario is all too common, yet not many people know how to handle it. Most people on the receiving end of an unwanted breakup will try to get their ex to somehow change their mind. The majority of them will fail however, because right now your ex doesn'twant to hear this line of reasoning. Immediately after the breakup? Your ex wants to be left pretty much alone.
The funny part is this: completely leaving your ex alone will actually make them want you back. To understand why, let's examine the basic psychology behind breaking up:
First, your boyfriend or girlfriend announces they're breaking up with you. This is the basest form of rejection, and you'll immediately feel the need to respond. Hurt, anger, bitterness... these things will go through your mind, but the prevailing emotion will ultimately be the panicked desire to set things right again. Essentially, you want your ex back because they rejected you.
Think about that for a minute. Do you want your ex back because you miss them? No, because you haven't even spent any time apart yet! It's the fear of losing your ex that makes you go crazy, and it's the idea of being alone that makes you want to fix your relationship - regardless of how bad or good it might've been lately.
The rejection of being dumped is almost offensive; it's a blow to the ego and it seems to indicate that something might be wrong with you. Getting your ex back proves all these things wrong, which is why you struggle so hard - and so quickly - to stop your breakup from happening. Chances are good you took your relationship for granted in the final few weeks or months... but now that your ex announced things are over? Suddenly it becomes majorly important again. You quickly become obsessed with keeping it around.
Now, let's apply the same logic to your breakup. When your boyfriend or girlfriend dumped you, he or she was pretty sure they were doing the right thing. By chasing after them and begging them to take you back? They suddenly know they did. You just reinforced their decision to find someone less needy, less desperate, and less dependent upon them for happiness.
Yet if they dump you and you dump them right back? Suddenly your boyfriend or girlfriend has to experience the same type of rejection. By agreeing with and accepting the breakup as if it doesn't bother you at all, you're actually putting yourself in the drivers' seat and making a preemptive strike. You're stopping the break up in its tracks, because you're going completely against your boyfriend or girlfriend's expectations of how things should go.
"Listen, you're probably right. Things aren't really working out, and neither of us have been happy. Good luck, okay? I wish you the best."
Walking away like this is the ultimate way to get your ex interested again. Suddenly your boyfriend or girlfriend has to face the idea thatyou are rejectingthem. Even though they might've brought things up, the very fact that breaking up doesn't scare you will seriously scare the crap out of them. Why? Because they expected to lose you on their terms. And your ex also expected to lose you gradually over time (with you still clinging onto them), instead of all at once.
Already broken up and not sure how to apply these techniques? Don't worry, because help is available. Learning how to stop and reverse this scenario can bedone from any stage of the breakup, no matter how long ago you may have parted ways.
How To Stop Your Breakup and Immediately Reverse It
