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subject: Confidence Building Tips [print this page]


You can be confident , All you have to do is rid yourself of confidence killers. Confidence killers are self-defeating thought patterns. A lot of us walk through life with these harmful assumptions.

See if you have got any of these evildoers in your thoughts

1. The All or Nothing Sniper

Thisway of thinking is the reason you can't seem to enjoy even the small wins you have been getting in life. I'll bet you were the kid in school who went home crying when you got one wrong on a test

You think you're a complete failure when your performance isn't perfect. You'd be confident if you did not spend so much energy being so hard on yourself

2. The Dark Cloud of Destruction

Look out There's a disaster hiding behind every corner. Expect it. The Dark Cloud of Destruction makes you think silly things like, I failed my chemistry test there's no point in even thinking about college, now.

3. Warlord of Negative Magnification

If you listen to this confidence killer you will never be confident. He is got a warped idea that if it is good- it doesn't really count. He will take any little negative anthill and magnify it like it's a mountain.

If you won 8 singing contests but had a cold for the 9th and came in second, he will harp on that ninth and you will never look at the 8 trophies as the great achievements they really are.

4. The If I feel it, it must be so' Monster

This is like a computer worm that shuts down all the clear thinking parts of your brain . A person with this can never be confident until they learn that how they are feeling does not necessarily match up with the truth. We all have days when we do not look our best or perform at our best.

The 'I feel stupid so I must be stupid' syndrome allows us to let our emotions run our lives. Do not blindly accept emotions as truth. Be confident enough to think that tomorrow you must be feeling different.

5. The Sinister Should

Perfectionists are good at should statements. Should statements are more about what your think other people expect from you than what you really want.

Should statements can be something like, Everybody should have an education plan. The person then thinks Oh, no I don't have an education plan! There must be something really wrong with me.

6. Libellous Labeller

Let's throw this one in jail and throw away the key. You know the thought. It is the one that we use to blame things on something. I am a loser. It must all be my fault. If you are going to think labels, label yourself a confident person.

7. Compliment Constrictor

This creepy crawler just cannot seem to let you accept a compliment. For once, if people tells you that you look good in that dress, don't let the slimy one takeover and say, Really I think it makes me look fat.

The good thing is that recognizing any of these villains is half of the battle. So put on your white hat- train yourself to cancel these confidence-killing thoughts.

by: Carolyn Sullivan..




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