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subject: How To Recover From Emotional Infidelity [print this page]

One of Gandhi's guiding principles is to return

good for evil. He didn't want to punish anyone;

he wanted to change them. And you change people

through example; not through pain. You change

them with moral authority; not physical

dominance. And his accomplishments are PROOF that

it works.

Here's a passage he quotes in his autobiography:

For a bowl of water give a goodly meal;

For a kindly greeting bow thou down with zeal;

For a simple penny pay thou back with gold;

If thy life be rescued, life do not withhold;

Thus the words and actions of the wise regard;

Every little service tenfold they reward.

But the truly noble know all men as one,

And return with gladness good for evil done.

Your assignment this week is a difficult one. I

want you to return good for evil. In other words,

if your spouse is nasty; be kind. If your spouse

yells; speak softly. If your spouse neglects you;

pay them attention. If your spouse hurts you;

love them.

It goes counter to human nature, but you can do

it. And doing it is good for you and good for

your marriage. Don't allow yourself to slip into

thinking about what your spouse deserves and

doesn't deserve. Don't think fair; think

effective. Remember, you don't want to be right;

you want to be happily married. Return good for

evil and you'll be happily married. You'll even

be able to recover from emotional infidelity.

Have a great week.

Warm regards,

Mort Fertel

Author & Founder of Marriage Fitness

by: Mort Fertel

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