subject: Considering A Career Change? Overcoming Personal Doubt [print this page] Everyone has said "I can't" at some point in their life. Sometimes it's because we don't believe in ourselves, have low self-esteem, feel shy and timid or even afraid. But through my years of experience with my own negative self talk and personal doubt, I have found that saying "I can't" is nothing more than a bad habit that gives us an excuse to stay stuck smack dab in the middle of our comfort zone.
You can spot your own personal doubt by paying attention to the things you tell yourself and the things you think about. If you find yourself making statements with the words "I can't" or "I don't" or "What if" quite often, this is a good indicator of your own personal negative talk. We all do it; it's just a matter of catching ourselves in the act.
Being your very own naysayer can be very destructive, because there is never a time when you are not with yourself. You carry your thoughts and feelings around with you wherever you go. So it is very important that you address this right from the start and rid yourself of these gremlins.
To help counteract your own negative self talk and self doubt, get in the habit of carrying with you a pen and paper or small notepad wherever you go. Whenever you find yourself thinking or feeling something negative, write down what you are thinking, the negative feeling that is associated with it and what triggered the negative reaction. At the end of the day, read over what you wrote down and look to see if there is a pattern. Is there something specific that keeps triggering the negative thoughts and feelings? Is there a common theme in your thoughts and feelings?
For example, do you find yourself constantly worrying about money or are you just feeling scared in general? In situations where you have told yourself you "can't" do something, write down what it is you are actually trying to avoid doing by telling yourself you can't and the reasons why.
By analyzing your negative thoughts and feelings, you will be able to better understand where the negativity is coming from, which will make it easier to figure out how to avoid it in the future.
But don't just stop there. After you analyze your negative comments and feelings, go back and write down two positive comments for every negative one. These positive comments can either be motivational statements or a simple reminder of a time when you did achieve a goal and how great it felt. This is a very important part of ridding yourself of your negative thoughts and feelings and developing more positive behavior patterns.
Another thing you can do to prepare for times of self-doubt is to write yourself a motivational letter. Doing so will give you something positive to read when you are having feelings of personal doubt. Because you will have written it during a time when you were feeling good about yourself, this will help to remind you of your more positive attributes and help to get back on the right track.
When it comes to your own personal doubts, it's not about "can" or "can't." It's about "will" or "won't." You "can" do many things to better yourself. The question is "will" you?
