subject: How To Get Your Ex Back: Coping With The Initial Breakup [print this page] Any man who has been through a break up understands the pain and loneliness.
Plain and simple, it is extremely difficult to deal with. And yes, while there are some great guidelines and tips to getting back your ex, it makes
sense to learn how to cope with that break-up initially for your own health and well-being.
HelpGuide.org, a leading website, says its mission is to help people understand, prevent, and resolve many of lifes challenges. They provide some very helpful and thoughtful suggestions.
First of all, try and understand why breakups hurt so much. You see, a breakup represents the loss, not just of the relationship, but also of those dreamy visions the two of you had for the future. Your romance started on such a note with a future vision you created together.
So it is easy to understand that When these relationships come crashing down, you experience profound disappointment, stress, and grief.
Everything is turned upside down---your routine and responsibilities, your home, your relationships with extended family and friends, and even your identity. A breakup brings uncertainty about the future. And we humans hate uncertainty. Questions crop up constantly such as What will life be like without your ex-girlfriend or wife? Will you find someone else? Will you end up alone? These unknowns feel worse that the rocky relationship itself.
That is why it so challenging to recover from a breakup or divorce. However, its important to know (and constantly remind yourself) that you can and will move on.
Just remember that healing takes time, so be patient with yourself. The pain of grief is precisely what helps you let go of the old relationship and move on. And no matter how strong your grief, it wont last forever.
Here are some tips HelpGuide.org suggests for helping you heal after your split from your ex:
1) Dont fight your feelings You'll have a ton of them. Identify and acknowledge these feelings.
2) Talk about how youre feeling with your friends and family. Knowing that others are aware of your feelings will make you feel less alone with your pain.
3) Remember: your goal is to move on. When you express your feelings, you will start to feel free from the hurtful situation. Do not focus on all the bad feelings or over-analyze the situation.
4) Tell yourself you've still got a future. When you commit to another person, you create many hopes and dreams. Its hard to let these dreams go. As you grieve the loss of the future you once held in your dreams, be encouraged by the fact that new ideas and hopes will take the place of your old ones.
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