subject: It's All About The Woman, Rarely The Man [print this page] I just listened to a song by Tim McGraw called Just To See You Smile. There's so much truth in this song and yet one glaring mistake.
The truth? Most men would do just about anything in order to see their lady smile. That is vital, key to a good relationship, and I've told women that they need to look for a man who is willing to swim an alligator infested pool just to bring her a glass of iced tea. A woman loves to have her man be her knight in shining armor, the one who comes riding in on the white horse and saves her. While there are a few women who still cling to feminism's old rant, "I don't need a man. I can do it myself," most women want men who can, or at least are willing, to rescue them whenever they need it.
Men, that will save your relationship.
But here's the problem. Many a man hears a song like Just To See You Smile and think that it means that a woman wants him to place her at the center of his universe. This could not be further from the truth. What he has done is push a key truth too far. A woman who is at the center of her man's universe soon realizes that her man thinks much too small. Don't get me wrong; a woman wants to be important, very important to her man. She wants him willing to sacrifice his life, if necessary, to save her. But she does not want to be the center of his universe.
What's the difference? How can a man be willing to sacrifice his life for his lady, and not make her the center of his universe?
The difference is with vision. Know this, Men, and it will save your marriage and make your life filled with meaning.
A woman does not want to be married to a man who has no vision, or a basis for living that is greater than himself or her. If she is the center of his universe, she is now the foundation of her man's happiness, the reason for his existence and the undivided center of his attention. Though it may be fun for a short time it is a role that is very tiring and humanly impossible to fulfill.
What a woman wants is a man who loves her over all others, but is captured by something greater than himself. A vision that drives him to climb mountains, conquer worlds, and leap tall buildings in a single bound. She wants a man that she can admire, a man that she can point to and say, "that's my husband". She wants a man who is growing, becoming better, moving other people's lives, and changing the world that he lives in. She wants a man that she can be proud of.
So, Men, be willing to do anything to put a smile on the face of the woman you love. But don't let that be your motivating goal in life. Find a vision that will take you and her with it.
Dr. Vance Hardisty - International Speaker and Author www.loverelationshipheadquarters.com
