10 Movies That Should Never, Ever Be Made Into Theme Park Rides
From the Pirates Of The Caribbean franchise to the Shrek rides of Universal Studios
, the relationship between movies and theme parks is as strong as ever and even Guillermo Del Toro is getting in on the action, attached to Disney's The Haunted Mansion. And in this day and age, studios would be looking into cashing in on any of their more popular franchises. Which, needless to say, can be hit or miss.
So, here are the 10 hypothetical attractions from movies that we hope will NEVER be syndicated into amusement rides, roller coasters or anything of their ilk. WARNING: HERE BE SPOILERS!
10.) Pineapple Express
A smoke-filled tunnel-of-love type deal where you get chased by animatronic dirty cops, pelted by cherry slushies and every once in a while, a random shoot out ensues, with your Jewish bubby waiting at the end with a plate of awesome flapjacks. Did we mention Danny McBride would be your tour guide?
9.) American History X
The most exciting adventure of your life! Shirtless Nazis! The kid from Terminator 2! And a good ol' fashioned curb-stomping! If this won't raise your heart rate, you must be a skinhead. And DON'T drop the soap.
8.) Dude, Where's My Car?
Start at the end of a 15-foot high maze and navigate to the middle to find your car, sidestepping dodgy old Chinese women and some insane cult with no backstory only to find mediocrity in the middle And then? Throw in an ostrich party and Andy "Why-does-he-still-have-a-career?" Dick and you've got a winner.
7.) Mulholland Drive
A teacup style ride where you get spun around so much you have no idea what the hell is going on. Which is kind of like the movie, really.
6.) Slumdog Millionaire
A quiz based show where you stand in a room and answer random questions about Indian culture. The more you get right, the closer you get to your true love! But you also get the crap beaten out of you by an Indian guy.
5.) A Streetcar Named Desire
Ride a wholesome, family friendly streetcar through a simulated New Orleans neighborhood in some incredible heat, only for a young Marlon Brando lookalike to beat the hell out of your friends and then feebly apologize to you later.
4.) The Matrix franchise
It's a sit down simulator that starts with some eye-popping, jaw-dropping, fast paced awesomeness and then it starts to flounder a little, sink deeper and deeper into mediocrity until you expect a huge, epic finish And be severely disappointed. Also, the waiting area for the ride will be you in a room with a guy who looks like Colonel Sanders talking about "purpose".
3.) Se7en
A tunnel of hell type ride where you watch people get brutally tortured, flogged, kicked, beaten and the horrors get worse and worse to the point where you question your own humanity. And what's that at the end? A cardboard box? What's in it? It's a dick in a boooox oh wait, no it's a head.
2.) Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas
Another sense-altering attraction, you sit in a simulated ride through Vegas wearing a ridiculous hat with a narrator spewing the most random assortment of words. With Benicio Del Toro by your side, it should be a hell of a ride. Be careful though: it's bat country.
1.) Deliverance
Not your standard log ride. Just before the final drop, fear for your life as the canoe gets chased after by shotgun wielding, sodomizing hillbillies. Yes. Sodomizing.
Maybe the drop isn't such a bad idea.
What other movies would be a... Read the complete new here
Movie News 10 Movies That Should Never, Ever Be Made Into Theme Park Rides
By: virgin cavalier
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