Celibate and Happy

Since 2000 I have been celibate

Since 2000 I have been celibate. After such a horrendous near death life changing experience I had not even thought about sex, not once, most people thought I was either a Man hater, depressed or a lesbian. The pressure people put on you for going against the grain, not being obsessed with finding a Man, always looking for love or just being happy being single, is massive but for me it works. Now in 2010 celibate 10 years and never going back is the best thing that has happened to me and has changed my life in more ways than one. I have the body at 53 I have always wanted after giving up sex, alcohol, chocolate, drugs, shoppingand caffeine.

I walk five miles a day, do yoga to keep focused and the natural high is better than any drug I have taken. I am not lonely because I believe you cannot look for love, just attract it and with my busy passion for life, sex is neither the point nor the focus. When you discover looking outward for fulfilment is just a rouse, you can never be alone because you always have yourself. When you look inward you learn you have to take responsibility for yourself and be brave enough to tackle the things that don't work for you in your life, starting with bad relationships, which ironically most of the time, sex is not part of.

I am now as budget lifestyle expert and self therapy life coach and teach other Women how to look and feel fantastic on a shoestring ina freelive touring interactive show The Hollywood Look For Less. Many women have lost their confidence, they don't feel sexy anymore and in the recession money is tight, so we try and inspire Women to swap clothes, get in shape and find time for themselves.

At Venus Cow we don't say it is easy to give up something you want but sometimes it might just be what you need. Losing everything including my life for a short while made me take a long hard look at myself, money had not made me happy, sex had never fulfilled my needs and when you have faced such fear, there is nothing else to fear. Now I keep my knickers on, I cannot beat Men off with a stick, they always want what they cannot have in my experience and until they get it, they never stop trying, so maybe if more Women followed suit, celibacy could be seen as very desirable.

My whole life now, is about giving back and helping other Women recognise sex is just like any other addiction, it's a choice. The definition of insanity is to repeat the same behaviour and expect a different result.

Celibate and Happy

By: Shirley and Holly Yanez

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