Constructively Giving Your Child Sports Advice
As a parent, you will want to give them feedback and advice on how to improve their performance in sports
. While you support them completely, sometimes this feedback can make your child feel like they are not performing to your standards.
What you say to your child should improve your child's enjoyment of the athletic experience instead of tearing it down. They should be encouraged and feel like they are being supported.
If you are like most sporting parents, you have probably broken one of these rules at least once. This is normal, you are learning how to be a parent as much as your child is learning how to play a sport.
These mistakes should be avoided whenever possible. There are several things you can do to avoid this kind of negative situation.
The first thing you need to make sure you do is always talk about what your child should do, instead of emphasize what they did wrong or what they should not do. This helps keep the conversation positive and encouraging even though you are giving advice.
For example, you should not tell you child that you do not want to ever see them forget to jump when rebounding ever again. Instead you should encourage him or her to jump when rebounding.
The second thing you should always do if you are going to criticize something is criticize the play. Some parents make the mistake of criticizing the player, which only tears down the self-confidence of the player and makes them play even more poorly.
Instead, these parents should take the focus off their child by criticizing the play instead of the player. However, all criticism should always end with a positive statement.
For example, you should never say to a young athlete that they messed up their serves horribly tonight. Instead, you should say something along the line of you struggled with your serves tonight, but if you look higher above the net next time you will have nothing but aces.
The third thing that parents should keep in mind is assuming that being told once is enough for a child to remember and implement. If the coach covers a new concept in practice, you may want to practice the idea with your child at home.
This will give your child more than one chance to let the idea sink in so he or she will remember it during a game. This is especially helpful if your child is young enough that his or her team does not practice every day.
Even during high school, coaches often do not have enough time to cover the side topics more than once. They have to spend their time emphasizing the most basic skills still.
Never assume that simply because the coach covered a topic, your child will remember and implement it. You can talk about the new concept with your child to make sure they understand it and practice the concept with them.
If you go over several times and you child still does not understand the principle, do not get frustrated. Instead try to explain or demonstrate it in a new manner.
Do not fall into the idea that you child is simply a slow learner. Sometimes a child has to learn a concept for themselves and they have to try it many times before they realize that it is not working.
The fourth thing you should remember is that what you say is going to have an effect on your child. Believe it or not, your child cares greatly about what you think.
They may even care more about what you say than what their coach thinks. Remember that you child may pick up a completely different message than what you say due to your tone of voice or body language.
If you repeatedly have problems communicating with your child, you may want to begin asking them to say what you said to them back to you. You will be able to correct them if they picked up a different message than you were trying to relay.
However, be sensitive to their feelings as they may feel like you are criticizing them when they do not understand the first time. They may feel stupid or slow.
These are not the feelings you are trying to convey. You want to build them up instead of tearing them down.
Remember to always be positive, no matter what the circumstances are. This will teach your child good sportsmanship as you help them become a strong young athlete.
by: Tommy Greene
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