Feel In Control On the Singles Scene
Feel In Control On the Singles Scene
Feel In Control On the Singles Scene
To be even more in control and to feel that you are empowered, make sure when you meet a prospective partner that it works for you. Take the emotion out of the meetings and act like a professional. If a prospective client doesn't buy from you, you don't have a tantrum and blame everyone else, do you? That's because you are a professional. You do your very best to listen to your clients or prospects, make the atmosphere and your attitude as comfortable as you can.
You know you have a much better chance of succeeding if you are prepared to listen to your client, take an interest in them and put them at ease. With your prospective clients you don't say, "he/she's too short, or lives too far away, or we have nothing in common," do you? You treat everyone the same. Well, the same goes for the people you are meeting, whether you like them or not. Treat each person with respect, warmth and friendliness, no matter what.
A relationship is an emotional experience, of course, but attracting people to you must be tackled in a professional manner if you want to give yourself a wide choice and be successful. When you have proven to yourself that you can attract everyone you meet, you will know that when that special person comes along you will be able to attract them.
To attract people in a professional manner, ignore your emotions. Don't buy into your initial opinion of this person you are meeting. Use your most professional manner to put them at ease and take an interest in them.
Control the conversation: don't allow personal stuff of any kind into the conversation. You will feel so empowered if you can avoid subjects like: previous relationships, problems at work,a dating agency you may be using,and the people you have met. Instead talk about his/her interests and find something you can both do together for the next meeting.
When you can come away from a meeting feeling very sure that the person wants to meet you again, you know you are in control. This feeling of empowerment takes the que sera' out of finding your life partner.
Once you feel empowered you will not leave anything to chance and will have the confidence to draw out the verybest in people. Good people are humble and their best qualities have to be drawn out. You won't discover them over a cup of coffee. It takes 3 meetings before people relax or forever if you are not very good at putting people at ease. The only way a person will open up and tell you about themselves is when they feel comfortable and relaxed and that's up to you.
The person who says they can tell immediately whether a person is right for them or not can make bad mistakes and usually tells of their previous mistakes. A woman may be stunning looking but what is the use of that if she lacks the qualities needed for a long term relationship.
A man who is positively charming and tells you all his good points as soon as you meet him, could be pushing his barrow because he is covering up his misdemeanours.
It is up to you to draw out the best qualities in each person you meet. You cannot afford to leave it exclusively to those to whom you are attracted. To feel empowered you need to be able to draw out the hidden qualities in everyone you meet.
There are steps to discovering that hidden gem, that person who has all the qualities you are seeking in a partner.
1 Make your manner professional, non-emotional and without exceptions.
2 Make him/her feel at ease and comfortable. No matter what your initial opinion of them is, act like a professional.
3 Take an interest in their interests. Listen to them. This is flattering if done in a professional manner.
4 Make the meeting fun, use your sense of humour. Most people like a little gentle teasing without being too personal.
5 Arrange to do things that interest her/him and especially things you are good at that interests them. For instance, if you know a lot about a particular sport that interests him/her suggest you watch it, or if you are an art buff and it interests her/him this will give you the opportunity to shine. When you are shining she/he will shine too.
6 Acknowledge their good qualities and draw them out. When he/she is considerate to you or to a waiter, don't let it go without comment. Acknowledge the behaviour you like about them. Acknowledge the things they tell you that you like. Once you make a habit of acknowledging what you like in others you will find yourself treating everyone similarly. Everyone likes to be acknowledged.
These 6 steps will empower you to feel in control of your destiny. At Entre Nous, my introduction agency, we find that the people who are successful in forming a long-term relationship are those who are successful in life; people who feel empowered; people who are confident that they will succeed with whatever they tackle. You too can be in control of your destiny by empowering yourself.
Rosalind Baker is the Principal and Founder of Entre Nous Introduction Agency, Melbourne, Victoria, Australia, and author of 3 best sellers, Dial A Woman, Dial A Man and Dial A Personality To find out: Your Personality Type, or to find out", Are You Eligible" or "Are you ready for a relationship?" visit:www.singles.net.au
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