Forgiving Is Not Forgetting When It Comes To a Cheating Wife
Forgiving Is Not Forgetting When It Comes To a Cheating Wife
Forgiving your cheating wife is not the same thing as forgetting that she has cheated. There is a huge difference between offering forgiveness for what your wife has done and going forward as though nothing profound has happened in your marriage.
Cheating is a big deal. It shouldn't be ignored and brushed under the rug. It doesn't have to mean the end for your marriage but it is something that definitely must be dealt with.
More importantly, cheating is often a symptom of other problems within the marriage and not the big bad evil problem in and of itself. In other words, you don't just have to deal with the fact that your wife cheated but you must also do a little digging to find out what is really going on inside her mind, her heart, and the marriage the two of you have created together.
In other words, the two of you have more than a little bit of work ahead of you. You'll probably never forget that your wife cheated. It's something that will always exist in your marriage. But, there will come a time, if you both work together, when it won't seem nearly as important that she cheated as it does today.
Even better, you may one day learn to see her cheating as the warning shot across the bow that got your attention and ultimately turned your marriage around. It's important to understand what forgetting is and is not before you move ahead with your efforts to save your marriage.
Forgiving is agreeing to put her cheating behind you. You're not saying it never happened of ignoring it but you are not going to hold it over your wife's head every time you have a disagreement from now until eternity (or divorce court, whichever comes sooner). Forgiving is telling your wife that you still lover her even though you don't like what she did to you.
Forgiving is not telling her that it's OK that she cheated on you. Forgiving your wife for cheating does not mean you're going to leave the door open for her to do it again. Forgiving doesn't mean you should trust her completely and go back to business as usual in your marriage.
She's going to have to work to earn your trust all over again and you're going to have to make her earn it. Remind her that you love her but don't be too quick to jump right back in and pick up where things left off.
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