HOW TO PREPARE FOR A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE WITHOUT EARLY DIVORCE
Constructing a building requires careful preparation
. Before the foundation is laid, land must be acquired and plans drawn up. However, something else is vital. Jesus said: "Who of you that wants to build a tower doe's not first sit down and calculate the expense, to see if he has enough to complete it?"-Luke 14:28.
What is true of constructing a building also applies to constructing a successful marriage. Many say: "I want tom get married." But how many stop to consider the cost? While the Bible speaks favorably of marriage, it also draws attention to the challenges that marriage presents. [Proverbs 18:22; 1 Corinthians 7:28] Therefore, those contemplating marriage need to have a realistic view of both the blessings and the costs of being married.
The Bible can help. Its counsel is inspired by the originator of marriage, Jehovah God. [Ephesians 3:16, 15; 2 Timothy 3:16] Using the principles found in this ancient yet very up-to-date guide book, let us determine [1] How can a person tell whether he or she is ready for marriage? [2] What should be looked for in a mate? And [3] How can courtship be kept honorable?
Are you ready for Marriage?
Constructing a building may be expensive, but caring for its long-term maintenance is costly as well. It is similar with marriage. Getting married seems challenging enough; however, maintaining a marital relationship year after must also be considered. What does maintaining such a relationship entail? A vital factor is a wholehearted commitment. Here is how the Bible describes the marriage relationship: "A man will leave his wife and they must become one fresh." [Genesis 2:24] Jesus Christ gave the only Scriptural basis for divorce with the possibility of remarriage-"fornication," that is, illicit sex relations outside the marriage. [Matthew 19:9] If you are contemplating marriage, bear these Scriptural standards in mind. If you are not ready for this solemn commitment, then you are not ready for marriage.-Deuteronomy 23:21; Ecclesiastes 4:9-12.
Living up to such commitment requires maturity. Thus, Paul counsels that Christians do better not to marry until they are "past the bloom of youth," the period when sexual feelings run strong and can distort one's judgment. [1 Corinthians 7:36] Young people change rapidly as they grow up. Statistics reveal that teenagers who marry early are much more likely to be unhappy and seek divorce than those who wait a little longer. So do not rush into marriage. Some years spent living as a young, single adult can give you precious experience that will make you more mature and better qualified to be a suitable mate.
KNOW YOURSELF FIRST
What traits do you have that will help you contribute to a successful marriage, and the qualities you want in a mate? As a type of husband and wife that you will be, will you freely admit your mistakes and accept advice, or are you always defensive when corrected? Are you generally cheerful and optimistic, or do you tend to be gloomy, frequently complaining? Remember, marriage will not change your personality. If you are proud, oversensitive, or overly pessimistic when single, you will be the same when married. The Bible encourages us to let God's holy spirit work in us, producing qualities such as "Love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faith, faith, mildness, self-control." It also tells us to "be made new in the force actuating [our] mind" and to put on the new personality which was created according to God's will in true righteousness and loyalty." [Galatians 5:22, 23; Ephesians 4:23, 24]
If you are a woman, learn to pay more attention to "the secret person of the heart than you do to your physical appearance. [1 Peter 3:3, 4] Modesty and soundness of mind will help you to have wisdom, a true "crown of beauty." [Proverbs 4:9; 10, 30; 1 Timothy 2: 9, 10] If you are a man, learn to treat women in a kind and respectful way. While learning to make decisions and shoulder responsibility, learn also to be modest and humble because a domineering attitude will lead to trouble in a marriage.
Apply this few thing before getting into marriage:
What to look for in a mate.
Find out beforehand who you want to marry.
Keep your courtship honorable in all aspect.
Always Looking beyond the wedding when have someone to marry.
Decide that when you find love you will show love.
Know that you will work with your partner to increase your financial status.
Remember that your wedding lasts just a one day, but your marriage lasts a lifetime. Avoid concentrating too much on the act of getting married. Instead, look to Jehovah God for guidance, and plan ahead for a life of being married. Then you will have prepared well for a successful marriage that love will grow strong.
HOW TO PREPARE FOR A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE WITHOUT EARLY DIVORCE
By: Emmanuel Bassey Joe
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