How To Know When He's Cheating - Common Signs Of An Affair

It is well known that women have excellent instincts

, especially where a husband or loved one may be concerned. Scientists have not been able to explain the gut instincts of women, but it is one of those well accepted facts of life.

It doesn't take many signs of an affair for most women to feel that rise in suspicion. With the very small, almost unnoticeable changes in behavior or daily patterns, most women are able to sense that something is happening. They know in their gut that those small little details mean something they must pay attention to.

However, what your gut is telling you and actually getting your hands on solid evidence are two entirely different things. Without proof you can't confront your husband about the changes you've noticed in his behavior. After all, a person's behavior can change without it meaning an affair is going on.

The last thing you want to do is tip your husband off to the signs of an affair that you are picking up on. That would only give him a chance to cover his tracks and become more careful, shutting you out from securing the concrete evidence that you need to find in order to be sure of the affair. The best thing you can do is keep your suspicion of the signs of a cheater to yourself and continue to look for additional evidence.

After noticing the beginning signs of an affair your friends and family may be the first place you want to turn. It's great to bring them in on what is happening if you need emotional support, but make it clear that you are not seeking advice or answers from them. The problem with friends and family members is that they love you so much it is hard for them to obtain the objective point of view that you will need to make sense of an affair and move forward from the experience. What you need is the support of your friends and family and the advice and expert opinions of an objective professional. That professional guidance is what makes the difference between wallowing in your pain and moving on after an affair.

If you can't afford to discuss typical signs of a cheater that you are picking up on with a professional, consider this quick rundown of what most professionals recommend for people in your situation:

Act as if everything is normal so you husband will think the coast is all clear. This will allow him to be less guarded and possibly more careless about his online activities. Eventually he will likely forget to erase his chat sessions or browsing history and may even forget to log out of a private account.

Keep track of the frequency, length, and intensity of his online activity. When he is chatting with someone online, is he displaying boyish emotions? In the past did he stay away from the computer after office hours, but now spends an excessive amount of time lingering in front of it? Is he logging on at all hours of the day and night?

-When you gain access to emails or chat sessions between your husband and someone else that gives concrete evidence of an affair, it's important to get them printed out or save them online in a hidden file. This is painful to read and do, but it is the solid evidence you need to confront your husband and get to the truth.

Once you have solid evidence to confirm the signs of an affair you've noticed, you'll be ready to confront your husband. However, take care not to act like the avenging angel you may feel like on the inside. This sort of approach will only be counterintuitive to your goal which is to save your marriage and restore the respect, trust, and love that you shared before this cyber affair.

by: Susan Richardson

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