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Ice Cream Could Save The World

Ice Cream Could Save The World

Ice Cream Could Save The World

Here are the facts that prove it.

Have you ever seen a angry person eating ice cream? Of course not. It's just impossible to eat ice cream and be angry at the same time. Ice cream is the world wide symbol for joy, pleasure and contentment. Ice cream is the cool tool we must begin using to calm all the tensions in our home and our world. Just imagine the benefits our society would reap if ice cream were present at all conflicts. With the advent of home ice cream makers, peace is at hand.

At home: "Mom, Billy punched me." "I don't want that for dinner; I don't like it." "Hurry up in the bath room." "You did what to the car?" "I'm going home to mother." "It's your turn to do the dishes." Just plug in the home ice cream maker and turn these squabbles into a hug fest.

In congress: With soft serve ice cream makers scattered through out congress, politicians would actually bargain and compromise. They wouldn't be able to talk so much with their mouths full of ice cream. Imagine, no more filibusters. Just a occasional ice cream break.

The world: Why not turn the united nations building into one huge ice cream parlor with ice cream makers in every office. Then, and only then, would world peace prevail. "Hey Abe, let's sign this treaty that will keep peace in northern Africa for the next two million years." "Sure Omar, but let's have some more ice cream first."

As ice cream mellowing advances, we can disband the army and close the prisons because there are no more wars and the only crime is ice cream theft. Families are kept together and, due to less travel, there is a huge energy saving. The United States economy does a 180, because, the world is buying the sixty billion home ice cream makers made in the USA every year. Drug companies begin producing ice cream flavors, because, it is discovered ice cream is a better cure than 75% of the drugs they make. Ford and GM put ice cream makers in their cars and trucks. Traffic fatalities drop 99%. And, the world becomes a beautiful place.

I know there are readers who will say this is the dumbest thing ever put to print. But, if you doubters carefully consider these facts you can only come to one conclusion. "ICE CREAM COULD SAVE THE WORLD."

by: Marianne B. Conway
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