Insight Into Interfaith & Secular Weddings

Deciding on the type of marriage ceremony to have is one very important aspect of

wedding planning that has to be completely addressed before doing anything else. One important factor to look at is religious inclinations of the concerned parties; being clear about this will make easy the task of deciding on the type of event to have. Religious weddings will be much easier for people who subscribe to some faith, yet for those who don't then that could be a difficult thing to do.

* Interfaith marriage ceremonies

If you and your future spouse don't share the same religion, you'll need to decide whether to have an interfaith wedding, this means having one officiant from each religion. Although in some areas, or some religions, finding an amenable officiant can be difficult, interfaith weddings are becoming increasingly more common. You could also decide to be married by a Justice of the Peace, or other civil leader, and then take a moment when you recite your vows to incorporate your personal beliefs.

* If one is agnostic or atheist

If one of you isn't religious and the other is devout, you'll need to compromise on what you want out of your wedding. Chiefly, you'll want to communicate with each other. You'll also want to talk to your families, counselors (including spiritual leaders) and friends. A solution might be to have a private religious ceremony, and a public civil one, or to closely customize your wedding incorporating religion delicately. Since religion won't disappear after your wedding day, this is good practice for other situations that may arise in your married lives, including raising children.

* Religious with a taste for things secular

If you're religious, but your families aren't, or if you've simply fallen in love with a secular site, you may feel torn about the laws of your religion. I recommend talking to your religious leader to get suggestions and to see what the necessary steps are. For example, a Catholic priest will tell you that you need to get a dispensation of place to have a recognized Catholic wedding in a non-Catholic spot. You could chose to have an intimate religious ceremony and a larger secular one.

* Non-believers

If you and or your spouse's family have religious roots, but you don't currently practice a faith, you may wonder if it's appropriate to have a wedding in a place of worship. First, consider if you feel comfortable in places of worship. Close friend who never thought he could get married in a church because it didn't seem particularly welcoming to outsiders, recently found himself in a church whose values closely align with his and he felt welcomed.

He remains non-practicing; but is now considering that church as a place for his wedding which he says will delight his devout Christian Mother. You'll also want to talk to the priest, rabbi, or religious leader and ask about their views on the matter. They may require religious counseling, regular worship attendance, or other programs. Lastly, talk with your families and discuss having a non-religious wedding. Ultimately, do what feels right to you and your future spouse.

by: Greg Savoie

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