Keys To Maintaining A Relationship

Many of us dont realize that it takes hard work in order to maintain a marriage relationship

. If you enter a marriage with the idea that if it doesnt work out you will divorce the relationship is already doomed. A marriage will not last with anything less than a total reckless commitment.

We all remember how we wanted that loved one to appreciate us before we were married. At that time we had the fear of loss spurring us on. Once we tied the knot so to say, circumstances changed. There was no more fear of losing that person. We put on our best face during the courtship in order to make it work and to make them want us as well as we wanted them. Once the conquest was made we no longer kept up the charade because it was hard work and we didnt deem it to be necessary.

Sugar pumpkin or whatever the nickname that we gave that loved one surprised us after we tied the knot because sugar pumpkin let his or her hair down and we discovered that they were not the way that we perceived them to be. As a matter of fact the time may have come that sugar pumpkin began to work on your last nerve. Now some of the bad habits are beginning to show. Maybe you thought that you saw a hint of something during the relationship but you wanted sugar pumpkin so bad that you overlooked the obvious. Now that you are married sugar pumpkin is not trying as hard to hide their defects and they may be getting irritated at some of yours.

Now is the time that your reason for getting married in the first place is being put to the test. I have come to the conclusion that real love is more than a feeling, it is a choice. We must choose to overlook the faults of our loved ones and decide to love them regardless.

The key to maintaining a relationship is learning to be a giver instead of a taker. We should not depend on other people for our well being and livelihood, we need to depend on God. Whenever we enter a relationship just for what we can get out of it we end up sorely disappointed.

Unfortunately many of us define our well being by what we can receive from others rather than internalizing and looking to ourselves. When we do this we become a taker rather than a giver because we depend on someone outside of ourselves for our well being. This puts us at a mental risk. Now our happiness and well being is dictated by what they do. When we put our trust in God we dont have to place it in others.

A relationship is like a garden. It must receive water, sunshine, and nutrition in order to survive and ultimately grow. The ideal relationship occurs when both parties are givers. In that scenario both can learn to live with the faults of the other. When both are givers each one is not seeking their own but the interests of the other party.

Givers look to plants seeds of love, care, and nourishment into each others lives. These are the seeds that cause the relationship to thrive. A good relationship is not threatened during bad times because the people in it are givers therefore they are more concerned about the well being of the other. It will thrive because the situation will serve as an opportunity for each to show love and concern for the other.

Givers are not in the relationship to dominate their partners. They are there to please their partners and enjoy their company. Givers overlook character flaws because they are givers. Their own interests become secondary to the relationship. If you are in a situation where you are not happy learn how to be a giver. Riceland Enterprises

by: tishbite

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